Extremely Irate Customer: I have just crapped my pants! Are you happy now? There is crap in my pants! I have CRAPPED MY PANTS!

U of MN
Overheard by Innocent Bystander.

Prim girl in flower print dress to prim girl in yellow sundress: Watch out for the dude in the tattoos.
Prim girl in yellow sundress: Ya, no doubt. Wait, which guy in the tattoos?
Prim girl in flower print dress: The one who keeps saying he is a Uptown Legend.

beer line at Pizza Luce Block Party
Overheard by Taco.

Mom (in hissing voice under her breath): Now is not the time to breastfeed.
Child (estimated at 10 years old): Yes, it is!
Mom: No, it’s not!

wedding reception at the History Center