Overly-excited little girl: MOM!!! THEY HAVE FREE BLUE PAINTER’S TAPE!!!
Overly-excited mom: FREE blue painter’s tape?! Are you sure?!?

Overheard by em.

Small, confused, city-bred child (staring at the largest pig): Mom, are you SURE its not dead?!?

Overheard by em.

Longwinded retiree: Now, some people think I’m crazy for going all the way to the airport to get a cup of coffee, but it’s the best darn coffee you can get. I even got them to give me this badge so I can come down whenever I want.
Exhausted man sitting across the aisle: Yeah, they gave me a badge, too.
Longwinded retiree: Sir, I believe that’s an M&M’s wrapper.

Hiawatha Line Southbound
Overheard by Kind of wishes she’d have gotten some M&M’s for the ride.

Girl #1 (screaming): I have a good smelling vagina. It smells just fucking fantastic.
Girl #2: I just moved here, can you just let people think I’m normal for a few months?

Corner of 27th and Colfax

A couple, probably on a blind date, strolling through women’s ready-to-wear.
Tall yuppie: Do you have a louse-edge?
Bookish date: A what?
Tall yuppie: A louse-edge?
Bookish date: What’s that?
Tall yuppie: You know, for your throat?
Bookish date: You mean a lozenge?

Downtown St. Paul Marshall Fields
Overheard by da Messica.