college girl: And they stuck me in a toilet! I couldn’t believe it!

WSU
Overheard by confused.

Girl who doesn’t understand the Olympics: How come so many are from Minnesota?
Friend: Probably ’cause… lots of girls play hockey here.
Girl who doesn’t understand the Olympics: Well, it seems like all the Olympians are either from Minnesota or, like, Massachusetts and stuff.
Friend: Yeah, but that makes sense.
Girl who doesn’t understand the Olympics: Well then where are the rest of the Olympians from… Canada?
Friend: Really?

Gustavus Adolphus cafeteria
Overheard by egon_getts.

Middle-aged woman to college-age man: So I see you’re still carrying that man-purse.
College-age man: It’s not a man-purse. It’s a wallet with straps.

U hallway
Overheard by Right.

Customer: Do you have a public bathroom?
Employee: No, I am sorry, the closest one is at the gas station around the corner.
Customer: Is there any alleys around here?
Employee: Yeah, but I wouldn’t recommend that.
Customer: …any low traffic alleys?

The Alt/ Uptown

Average Man: If you think about it, “assless chaps” is an oxymoron. Have you ever seen chaps with an ass?
Average Man Friend: Right, if they had an ass they’d be leather pants.
Average Man: No one is going to wear chaps that have an ass…

Coming out of Cuzzy’s
Overheard by Miss Aviña.