Operator: Directory assistance, How can I help you?
Man with a heavy southern accent: Uh, yeah. I need the number to 911.
Operator: (Trying not to laugh) Sir, the number for 911 is… 911.
Man: Thank you!!
15 minutes later
Operator: Directory assistance, how may I help you?
Man: Uh, yeah. I just called and one of you people gave me the wrong number for 911. Can I speak with a supervisor?

Roseville
Overheard by The Operator, deperately trying not to laugh.

College student home from out of town, to the boyfriend who was sucking on her neck the entire time: The girl next to me on the plane was, like, a Born-Again Christian, but she was, like, really sweet - like, REALLY sweet, and she was, like, really, like interested, like, in what I was, like, studying.

On the train at the 46th Street Station
Overheard by PTW.