Teach: Does anyone know why Luxembourg has a really high GDP per capita?
Student #1: Because there’s only like 10 people there.
(everyone chuckles)
Student #2: Is that an exaggeration or are there literally only 10 people there?

U of M
Overheard by Dik.

Teen Cheerleader: I think hobos are hot.
Friend: Why?
Teen Cheerleader: I don’t know. There’s just something sexy about trains I guess.

Micky D’s

Crazy man pleasuring self in bathroom stall: He said to just give her a slap! Hee hee! A slap! Burn, baby, burn!

Knollwood Mall
Overheard by LDG.

Line cook #1: My toe just started throbbing for no reason!
Line cook #2: What happened?
Line cook #1: I don’t know, but I just squeezed a quater gram of puss out of it.

At work
Overheard by MRK.

Downtrodden gent: Got any change for a pop?
4 folks: Sorry, we’re broke.
Downtrodden gent: (pause) Got any meth?

22nd & Lyndale SA
Overheard by they didn’t look like the “meth” types.

Cheerfully malicious voice in hallway: Jenny, do you wanna DIE?? DO YOU?!

U of M dorms
Overheard by i locked my door.

Man: Did you bring the paperwork?
Woman: I ain’t going down there for no reason!
Man: Hey - I went down there for no reason! Baby, why you gotta have a attitude?
Woman: I don’t have a attitude.
Man: I bet you ten dollars you have a attitude.
Woman: Boy, you’re gonna give me a attitude!
Man: Good! I need the ten dollars.

Back of the #6
Overheard by someone also in need of $10.

Mom: If you don’t stop hitting your sister and start behaving nicely, we’re gonna go right back there and return those guns!

Super Target, Roseville
Overheard by Attention Target Shopper.

College-Aged Woman: Yea, the new building they’re adding on is gonna cost 55 million dollars.
College-Aged Man: 55 Million!!!!! That’s like, a TENTH of a battleship!!!

South Mpls Coffeeshop

Guy to his two friends: Sometimes I lie in the street and people think I’m homeless so they throw money at me.

U of M
Overheard by ristee.