Man playing guitar: Happy New Year!
Inebriated woman singing next to him: Man, that’s the wrong holiday!
Man playing guitar: Wait, then Happy Easter!
Inebriated woman singing next to him: No, that’s too far away.
Man playing guitar: What’s the nearest holiday?
Inebriated woman singing next to him: Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
Man playing guitar: YEAH! Happy St. Patrick’s Day!
Drunk man across from him: Having a little trouble with the holidays?
Man playing guitar: Sorry man, I’m stoned.

Downtime Bar & Grill off University Ave, on the U of M campus
Overheard by Someone who had an inkling that not just drinking had been going on.