Teen girl, whispering loudly to slouched friend: Look, you can wear those ripped jeans here, but you can’t look strung out!
Slouched friend: Man, what the f–k.

Lynnhurst UCC

During kindergarten morning show and tell
Angelic-face little girl: Ummmmmm, my mommy hates ‘Publicans and there’s a crack head living in our basement.

Green Central Elementary
Overheard by perplexed teacher…and every other clueless kindergartener.

Angstful teen to mother: Why didn’t you raise me to be Jewish?
Mother: (pause) Have you been watching Fiddler on the Roof again?

Uptown Lund’s
Overheard by lolololol.

Middle-aged man in an Italian restaurant speaking to his wife: You know, another thing I heard the Pope say…
Little boy, who’s clearly been wondering for awhile: WHO THE HELL’S THE POPE?!?!?!

Buca’s (very Catholic restauraunt)
Overheard by hahahahahahaaaa.

Little girl:Mommy, does the moon eat?
Perplexed mothe: No, honey, why do you ask me that?
Little girl: Then why do people say it’s full??

Queen’s Beach, Lake Harriet
Overheard by skinny dipper.

Woman talking to tattooed hipster: Uhm, so are you in touch with your feminine side at all?
Tattooed hipster: Uh, yeah, man. I like the lesbian scene in that one David Lynch movie.

The Bad Waitress, 24th & Nicollet
Overheard by lolwtf.

Italian employee: Did you hear about that girl who had her dog kidnapped, and the person cut the dog’s head off, gift wrapped it and left it on her front steps?
Boss: Yeah, I did, that is terrible.
Italian employee: Who would do such a thing?
Boss: (Fully aware his employee is Italian) An Italian person, of course. Italian people do those kinds of things. No one else would ever do something like that besides an Italian person.

work
Overheard by wanting to kick his ass.

Kid standing on Rock-Hill over looking Duluth, Lake Superior and Wisconsin: Man, look how gay Wisconsin is!

Rock-Hill behind UMD dorms
Overheard by thank goodness I live in MN.

5th Grade Girl: I’d like to be a boy for a day just to know what it is that they talk about.
5th Grade Boy: It’s not that interesting.

Punch Neopolitan Pizza