Co-worker on the phone: Tell him to back off… but say it in a nice way.

Office
Overheard by Garage girl #1.

Two Female Teens Shopping. One holding a pair of sweatpants with Alpha Chi Omega screenprinted across the butt.
Teen #1: What does it mean?
Teen #2: It’s a sorority.
Teen #1: But what does it mean?
Teen #2: It means that you are part of their sorority.
Teen #1: What?
Teen #2: It means that you are part of their club.
Teen #1: But doesn’t it MEAN something?
Teen #2: (visibly annoyed) Yes. I told you, It means that you are part of their club.
Teen #1: What do the WORDS mean?
(Teen 2 ignores the question completely)
Teen #1: Hmm. Which ones should I get? (Comparing two pairs of sweatpants)
Teen #2: Get the sweatpants without words.

Dots - Har Mar Mall, Roseville
Overheard by Thinks it was good to pick the plain pair of pants.

Cop #1: So, he tried to get away? What did you do?
Cop #2: I shot him in the leg.

Squad Car
Overheard by Scared 16 year old in back.