Man: He’s been dating women he’s met online since back when it was creepy.

Uptown Balcony
Overheard by Sherman.

Girl: Go over there by the fire, I’m gonna take a picture of your shilute.
Friend: haha My what? My silhouette?
Girl: I know how to say it, I just always forget.

madison lake

Woman to friend: ‘Cause, you know, I feel things. I’m, like, a feeler.

lunch time on nicollet mall
Overheard by feelin it!

Woman Dealer in her late 40s: (explaining to drunk guy how to play Three Card Poker)
Drunk Guy: So it’s like poker with three cards?
Guys in their 20s on the other end of the table: (laughing histerically)
(about 10 minutes later, dealer is still explaining how to play and getting frustrated because he is holding up the game)
Dealer: You should stay if you at least have a pair.
Drunk Guy: What if I have a full house?
Dealer: You can’t have a full house.
Drunk Guy: But I have one.
Dealer: It’s impossible to have a full house
Drunk Guy: Then this is, like, the first time ever.
Dealer: (Yells to Pit Boss) I’ve got the problem table!

Three Card Poker table at Hinckley Grand Casino
Overheard by The guy at the other end of the table.

College Guy: No wonder Matt can’t get a date- his best line is ‘Do you want a badly damaged brat?’

BBQ in the Suburbs

Wife: How did he get it in there? I totally missed it.
Husband: He just pushed it in with his finger.

Old Chicago, Roseville

Sex Panther Guy pointing @ Male Model Guy: You think he’s better looking than me?
Drunk Bikini Girl: Ya.
Sex Panther Guy: (In disgust) How many dates have you been on? Like 4!

Irving and Lagoon
Overheard by CoomDog.