A woman backs up in a crowded elevator and is standing in front of a baby stroller.
Mother of baby (not happy): You betta get your booty outta my baby’s grill.

Crowded elevator at MCTC
Overheard by Trying unsuccessfully not to laugh.

Boater: Can I drown your baby?
Mother: I’m sorry…what?
Boater: My friend says I can’t drown a baby, and I want to prove him wrong. Your kid’s ugly, so can I drown him?
Mother: I’m getting a cop.

Twin Lake
Overheard by Ironic, who quickly hid his kid.

Overweight Lesbian #1: Then I remembered that I got my nipples pierced! That should score me something!
Overweight Lesbian #2: Dude, it isn’t that type of concert.

Chipolte in Edina
Overheard by Am I going to the wrong concerts?

Man: So, how do you like the Boca burger?
Woman: Well, it’s okay. Except for the texture…and the taste…

BBQ

Guy on phone in hallway: So, now you just have to worry about harvesting the little children. [pause] Seemed like a good idea at the time.

Comstock Hall, U of M

7 or 8 year old suburban girl walking with 2 younger siblings/friends, guided by their mothers: No mom, it’s spelled N-U-D-I-S-T, Nudist.
Mother: Ohhhhh, I seeee.

1st Avenue/4th Street, Minneapolis
Overheard by baffled and disturbed.