Grandma with white frazzled hair: Honey, did you just eat a booger?!
4-year-old grandson: No. (quietly) I ate two boogers.

MOA
Overheard by Honest Abe.

20-year-old Frat Row girlfriend: Jenny is such a bitch! I mean, she’s like so rude all the time.
Ditsy obnoxious friend wearing too much makeup: Ohmigod I know! I think she’s a hermaphrodite.
20-year-old Frat Row girlfriend, to her Frat Row boyfriend: Can you go buy us a lemon drop martini?

Regina Spektor concert at The Myth
Overheard by Extra credit if she can spell hermaphrodite.

YWCA worker #1(to member coming in): Is it still hot out there?
YWCA member: Oh yeah.
YWCA worker #1: Gross. My apartment was like an ARMPIT earlier!!
YWCA worker #2: I’ve been there. I can attest to that.
(Several seconds later)
YWCA worker #2: Just to clarify, I’ve been to her apartment… not her armpit. Just wanted to clear that up.

YWCA Uptown
Overheard by just passing by.

20 something guy to his friends: I’m like the Martin Scorsese of video blogs.

Brainerd Country Kitchen
Overheard by you don’t have the eyebrows for it.