Burly man: I don’t even know if I wanna kick ya, I got my good shoes on.

hexagon bar/outside smoking corral
Overheard by finishing my beer and locking my bike.

Tall drunk man: I wanna tell you about my teeth. I wanna tell you about my balls.

40th and Pleasant
Overheard by sxoidmal.

Well dressed guy, listlessly, while playing with shiny-looking phone: Some people dream of sex, others wake up and work it, work it.

Riverside (”Ghetto”) Perkins

Twenty-something dude on bus: Dude, if someone hadn’t set the clocks back, I would’ve been HELLA late this morning. I’m such a procrastiner.

Nicollet Mall, bus 18
Overheard by A procrastinATor.

Ghetto white boy to ghetto white girl sitting across from him: Don’t look at me like ya mama don’t feed you.

route 16
Overheard by “I put out”.

Tall blonde girl in line for free Chipotle, adamantly to her friends: But it really is real! My gynecologist told me so!

Stadium Village Chipotle on Washington Avenue
Overheard by I hope whatever is real is curable…

Very Loud Asian teen to friend: Dude, I think you’re turning me gay!

50th and Frace

Boy to mother, referring to a hissing cat: See! Even she don’t want you to be no god damn bald-headed nun!!

30th & Penn N.