One Finance Department person to another: Know what ELSE you should never put in your nose?

Office hallway, downtown Mpls
Overheard by sparklegirl.

Customer: Hey where’s PB Loco?
Employee: They closed.
Customer: What!?
Employee: Sorry, they closed.
Customer: Shit, I came all the way out here for a peanut butter sandwich! (sighs…) Where else can I get one?
Employee: My mom makes a wicked PB&J, but we gotta wait ’til after nap time.

Mall of America
Overheard by PB Loco lover.

Loud irate woman to policeman: I’m going to call the cops on you! You’re going to go to JAIL!
Man standing nearby: Who do you think you’re talking to, dumbass motherf*cker? He is the cops.
Irate woman storms off.

SA on 35th and Nicollet
Overheard by Saint Ramer.

Sleazy Officeworker: Dude, I went to Barnes and Noble last night.
Sleazy Officeworker’s Friend: What’s that?
Sleazy Officeworker: What’s what?
Sleazy Officeworker’s Friend: Barns or whatever?
Sleazy Officeworker: It’s a bookstore. Tight as hell…
Sleazy Officeworker’s Friend: YOU? Why?!
Sleazy Officeworker: You know, like, to expand my mind ‘n’ shit.
Sleazy Officeworker’s Friend: Oh, to learn shit?
Sleazy Officeworker: Yeah, man. I walked through the whole store, man… (awkward pause) …never found anything I liked.
Sleazy Officeworker’s Friend: You’re a real champion.
Sleazy Officeworker: Yeah.

Grimy Call Center, Eden Prairie
Overheard by Me.

Some Idiot: …I don’t know, dude. It probably runs in his genes.
Some Idiot’s Buddy: (shocked) Dude! What?
Some Idiot: What? It runs in his genes!
Some Idiot’s Buddy: What’s THAT supposed to mean?
Some Idiot: It. Runs. In. His. Genes. You know, like, his genes?
Some Idiot’s Buddy: (relieved) OOHH, you mean like, it’s… hereditary or some shit.

Drab, Nameless Call Center, Eden Prairie
Overheard by Me.

Very excited young white woman to friend: Omigod, they work us like slaves there.
Black man, reading book glances at them for a second

Southbound 4 bus, Hennepin/8th
Overheard by sxoidmal.