Businesswoman: So, are you out for lunch?
Businessman: Yep.
Businesswoman: Out meeting your mistress?
Businessman: Well, you’re here.

Skyway
Overheard by JfA.

20-Something Chick in Restroom #1: I hate this weather, but it’s always so warm here.
20-Something Chick in Restroom #2: I know, I hate wearing restrictive clothing. I mean, I can’t move, I can’t dance, I can’t say hi…

Santorini, St. Louis Park
Overheard by A simple ‘hello’ just won’t cut it.

Boy: He’s not FROM here, Mom.
Mom: Where’s he from?
Boy: I don’t know but he didn’t speak our language.
Mom: What language does he speak?
Boy: I don’t know but he learned our language now.
Mom: Russian, then. Russians learn our language faster than any other alien.

Medina Target
Overheard by Martians can assimilate too.

Ex-Girlfriend’s Roommate (on eating vegetarian lasagna): Hell no I won’t eat that! If I did I might grow a vagina!

Bradley and Fuller Street, Mankato
Overheard by I miss my vagina.

Girl: I like Oprah!
Guy: I think she’s annoying.
Girl: That’s racist!
Guy: What? That makes no sense. I don’t hate her cause she’s black, I hate her cause she’s annoying.
Girl: You’re still racist.
Guy: Whatever.

Cooper High School
Overheard by Not a nerd.

High School Thug: Can I borrow your calcalater?
Girl: Yeah, but you have to give it back.
High School Thug: Don’t worry, I’m not gonna take it, I’m not full black.

Cooper High School
Overheard by Not a nerd.