12 year old boy: It’d be much cooler if the dolphin would jump through a ring of fire.

MN Zoo
Overheard by It’s  the zoo, not the circus.

Little Kid: Where’s daddy?
Frustrated Mom: He’s sitting down in front because he doesn’t know how to listen or follow the rules.

MN Zoo
Overheard by HA! Awesome.

Ghetto thug teen #1 leaving “21″: Man, that was a good movie.
Ghetto thug teen #2: Shit yo, let’s go learn us some math.
Ghetto thug teen #3: I gots-to start payin’ attention in that class.

Roseville movie theater
Overheard by wondering if they’ll apply to MIT to learn to count cards.

Girl #1:  Giiiiiiirl, you know I got pregnant again.
Girl #2:  Who the daddy be?
Girl #1:  You know that Asian boy I always be with at John’s* parties?
Girl #2:  That baby be cute, be like a little Tiger Woods blackanasian baby, but girl, you know you got to get an abortion.
Girl #1:  Nah, my momma says she help me take care of this one.

in line at a the Block E Movie Theater downtown Minneapolis
Overheard by Joseph Howell.

Guy walking into Local Motion: So I just check my penis at the door then?
Passerby: Yup!

Local Motion - Uptown
Overheard by Revert.

Guy #1: Now that I know she was f—ing the prof, it makes you wonder, what about that other class we had together? Was she f—ing that prof too?
Guy #2: How do you know they were f—ing?
Guy #1:: Well, I saw them walking together. What else would they be doing?

u of m west bank
Overheard by a logical conclusion indeed.

Grandma to 2 year old: Grandma just had a full-flavored cigarette, very full-flavored. Too bad you couldn’t come with me.

Uptown VFW

Man: Men gotta piss all the time.

March 16th Springsteen concert, Xcel Center.
Overheard by no we don’t, get your prostate checked.

Girl #1: You look tanner. Did you go tanning again?
Girl #2: Yeah.
Girl #1: Tanning is bad for you. Didn’t the doctors just have to biopsy your mole?
Girl #2: Whatever. It doesn’t matter. I refuse to have cancer.

u of m living establishments
Overheard by and then she was CURED by the power of optimism.

Older woman (to cashier at Kohl’s): I got the runs.
Cashier looks confused.
Older woman: I got the runs, you know, diarrhea!

Kohl’s Eden Prairie
Overheard by TMI.

Guy #1 to Guy #2: So, I have a date with her this Saturday. We’re going to the Olive Garden, she wants me to dress nice.
Guy #2: I can’t believe all these girls want to dress up to go to the Olive Garden.  It’s nothing more than an Italian Perkins.

bus #16
Overheard by but it has a nice salad bar.

One teenage girl is telling her friends about her grandfather’s motorcycle trip to Alaska
Friend: How did he get there? Is there a bridge to Alaska?
Teenage Girl: Yeah, its called Canada.

Eden Prairie High School English classroom
Overheard by our tax dollars hard at work.

Open-Minded Woman: We all ignore Velveeta because we grew up with it; it’s like we don’t even think about it anymore.
Unfortunate friend:  Yeah.
Open-Minded Woman:  I mean, if Velveeta were something from some other society I think we would all look at it as something special.

Skyway between Macy’s/IDS
Overheard by Re-thinking Velveeta.

Punk woman #1, carrying huge box of tampons: Uhh, I hate spending money!
Punk woman #2: Me too.
Punk woman #1: Yeah, I wish we lived in Russia.  They’re communist.
Punk woman #2: Communism is actually a good system.
Punk woman #1: At least they don’t make you pay for TAMPONS!

Target by Knollwood
Overheard by a man who doesn’t have to pay for tampons.

Girl in cubicle: I’ve been rubbing that thing all day. I’m afraid I’m going to rub a hole in it!

The office in Lakeville
Overheard by Cupcake Helper Man.

Dim 40-Something: Air-reb-snah.
Guy Pretending to Work: What?
Dim 40-Something: Your name backwards is Air-reb-snah.
Guy Pretending to Work: I pronounce it Eee-reb-snah, the ‘k’ is silent.
Dim 40-Something (in wonder): Wha? (silence… coming to a realization) There is no ‘k’.
Guy Pretending to Work: I know.

Hopkins Cubicle Farm
Overheard by putting up with this on a Friday afternoon.

Naive Print Coordinator on the phone: I didn’t touch it after I did it with you the other day. No, I didn’t get samples. I have no idea, but it’s gotta be on top.

over the cube wall 50 S. 10th St.
Overheard by Mind in the Gutter.

One Coffee shop attendant to another: Hey, I don’t want to go in any deeper, just brace your self on that ledge there.

Overflow Espresso Cafe
Overheard by Paul Escalante.

Crazy man, at the top of his voice as he boards quiet bus: Repent! Repent all ye sinners and turn to the Lord Jesus Christ! Today is the day to repent! Today is the day to turn to Jesus! Repent! Repent! *begins handing out tracts*
Extremely small lesbian in front row: GET THAT SHIT OUTTA MY FACE!!!!
6 year old girl: What did that lady say?
Her mother: She didn’t want to take one, honey.

14A bus
Overheard by Haddayr Copley-Woods.

Classmate: Aren’t we going to go over current events?
Sorority Girl: Were there any?

SJMC, U of M
Overheard by Appalled that we’re receiving the same degree.