Chaperone to kindergartener on field trip bus: Why are you crying, honey?
Kindergartener: Because I don’t want to sit with my mom!
Chaperone: You… you don’t want to sit with your mom? Why not?
Kindergartener: Because she’s fat and everyone will laugh at me!
Fat mom: I am wasting my time, I don’t know why I came here, I am wasting my time.

Returning from trip to Children’s Museum, St. Paul
Overheard by That’s a sorry-I-asked if ever I heard one.

Guy #1: …like Paul from The Beatles.
Guy #2: Paul Simon?

hallway in Bethel University
Overheard by aeh.

Man: That building over there used to be a whorehouse.
Woman: Really? I guess the one on the corner was a whorehouse, too. Isn’t that interesting?
Man: It sure was a whorehouse! You know, I used to live in a whorehouse…

Bus 61 to DT Saint Paul
Overheard by Business was booming on Arcade.

Girl #1: Does my ass look okay in this?
Girl #2: Yes.
Girl #1: Would you lie to me?
(pause)
Girl #2: Yes, but I’m not lying right now.

Target- nordeast
Overheard by well at least that’s honest

Woman talking to herself: I think I’m okay, actually.

Costco in Eden Prairie
Overheard by sure you are.

Middle school girl swimmer #1:  Do you know where the U.K. is?
Middle school girl swimmer #2:  How do you spell it?

Rochester Rec Center
Overheard by You don’t need to be smart to swim fast.

Homeless Man: Hey Girlie, gimmie a bite of your hamburger. (girls keep walking) Well, my mother ain’t wooden.

McDonalds in dinkytown
Overheard by My Mother IS wooden.