Gay sandwich artist #1: Yeah, I just have sugar daddies.
Older/Wiser gay sandwich artist #2: Yeah, what happens when the sugar’s all gone and daddy’s not at home?

Bruegger’s downtown MPLS
Overheard by Ben.

3Mer #1 (with a southern accent): I thought you said it was warmer up here.
3Mer #2: Well, it’s warmer now than when you were here in November.
3Mer #1: Yeah, but my refrigerator is warmer than this state.

3M Center, St. Paul
Overheard by I agree completely.

Teenage Girl (Matter-of-Factly): My sister’s friend came over yesterday because it was Memorial Day, you know, because she’s a stripper.

Wayzata High School
Overheard by Yeah, that makes total sense…

Wannabe Cool Guy on cell phone: Yeah, I’m going to by a cheap-ass skateboard so I can get around.  <pause>  Yeah, instead of paying for bus passes, I just buy cheap skateboards.  It’s just easier.

Edina Target
Overheard by Pheebs.

Hair Stylist #1: Remember her? The one that got pregnant.
Hair Stylist #2: Oh, the receptionist? The one with all the horses?
Hair Stylist #1: Yeah! Why did she move to Anoka anyway?

Hair Salon in Minneapolis
Overheard by I just want a haircut, thanks…

Girl(near some geese): Look! It’s a turkey.

Wolfe Park
Overheard by From a bench nearby.

Collection Agency worker #1 (sarcastic and genuinely not happy): I just made an 84 year-old woman cry, so I feel pretty good about that.
Collection Agency worker #2: Yeah?
Collection Agency worker #1: Yeah.
Collection Agency worker #2: Did she pay at least?
Collection Agency worker #1: No.

SLP office building
Overheard by JoeS.

Middle Aged Woman: I mean, the boy probably won’t finish his Easter candy before he graduates and moves out!

Plymouth Starbucks

Middle Aged woman to friends: When I was younger I used to be embarrassed when I pooped my pants.  Now that I’m middle aged I don’t care anymore.

Blaine Target
Overheard by Because it’s socially acceptable when you’re middle aged?

Older woman on phone with friend: Yea, losing a body part is never fun, for sure.

225 South 6th St
Overheard by Um… I plan to keep all of my body parts, thanks.

Guy: You remember when the 35W bridge fell down? None of my family called me. None! So, I sent an email to them: “Just so you guys know, I was almost on that bridge!”

Mall of America store
Overheard by I think I know why they never call…

Teen Girl: We don’t get to keep the gowns. We get to keep the hats.
Mom: Umm, yeah, I know.
Teen Girl: Those hats are so stupid.  I’d rather gag than wear it.

Kohl’s in Blaine
Overheard by the Elderly Multigravida.

Girl: 45 whole seconds huh?
Guy (defensively): Well, I haven’t been masturbating!

Grumpy’s in Roseville
Overheard by maybe you should.

Girl:  Sometimes I like to look at pictures of deaf people online.  They don’t look any different!

U of M campus

Girl on Phone: Hey girl!  I just got done lubricating my Rubik’s Cube!

Hopkins High School
Overheard by Momo.

Teenage Guy: Hey, can I have an arm massage?
Teenage Girl: I am NOT giving you another arm massage.
Teenage Guy: Please?
Teenage Girl: NO.
Teenage Guy: Ankle massage?

Hopkins High School
Overheard by Julie.

Guy: I decided I would do a little social experiment.  So I went to the gas station and bought a chocolate muffin and sat down outside the door.  Then this guy passed me, so I shoved the muffin in my mouth and started singing “What if God Was One of Us” with little pieces of the muffin falling out of my mouth.  It was great.

Hopkins High School
Overheard by Julie.

Employee: And how are you doing today?
Customer: Hey, if I was any better, I’d be a parade!

Trader Joe’s
Overheard by sxoidmal.

Loud teen girl on cellphone: Jaime, I’ve been CALLing you! Didn’t you feel it in your pants?

accessories section at Edina Target
Overheard by yikes.

Loud white ghetto guy on cellphone: Dude, I’m at target. They don’t got nothing here! Man, I should have gone to Wal*Mart. (pause) Ooh, here’s a sweet knife. Maybe I’ll buy that for shits and giggles.

Crystal Target Camping Isle
Overheard by Gee, you have to wonder what this guy does with his free time…