Visibly Pregnant Woman to friend: Oh wee, I can’t wait to gets me some Ol’ Country Buffett. Oh, where can I pick me up some smokes?

21 Bus
Overheard by Give the fetus a filter.

Girl talking on the phone: Hey, I left my camera there last night. Oh, and my hammer. And Jane left a mallet.

U of MN superblock
Overheard by what kind of party was this?

(Shuttle pulls up nearly hitting a student waiting, jokingly)
Boyfriend of girl that almost got hit to bus driver: Dude, if you would have hit her, I would have had to just key the shuttle.
Bus driver: That’s it? (bursts into laughter)
Girlfriend to boyfriend: Awww… thanks for defending me!

Bethel University
Overheard by m.jo.

Blonde:  I’m STARVING!  But I’m really not hungry.
Friend: That doesn’t make sense.
Blonde: I know, but it’s how I feel!

Gustavus coffee shop
Overheard by just let it out.

Blonde neighbor (reading a recipe): Have you ever heard of corn oil?

Alley in Minneapolis
Overheard by Garage Girl #1.

Young liberal girl:  Yes, if you look at the Mormon church and all that they say, it’s crazy. If you get married in a mormon church you get special underwear, you get your own planet when you die, and you are eternally pregnant. Yes, ’cause 9 months isn’t enough, I want to be preggers forever! SIGN ME UP MORMON CHURCH!

u of MN campus, mall area

Middle-aged white man: What do we need party supplies for?
Middle-aged white woman (loudly): It’s Pentecost next week!!

Highland Park party store
Overheard by duh, obviously!

Noble errand running friend: Here.
Uninjured guy laying on the curb next to the bushes at 2am: Dude, this is only one napkin; I said I need two motha fuckin’ napkins.

U of M, Bierman Sports Bldg
Overheard by yo ho ho.

Girl: How do you spell Buchanan?
Boy: B-u-c-h-a-n-a-n.  It’s like banana but with a “ch”.

Dunn Brothers Eden Prairie West
Overheard by Politically incorrect?

Barista: Would you like room for cream in your coffee?
Yuppie business man: No! I’m not a nazi.

Dunn Brothers Eden Prairie West
Overheard by Because Nazis clearly have a monopoly on cream.