Mother to her son: Pac Man, get your ass over here.

Regal Movie Theater Brooklyn Center
Overheard by Waiting for my popcorn.

Melodramatic Teenage Girl (to Mom): FINE! Is THAT what you want!? I’ll just go to my room and CUT myself.
7yr Old Little Brother: Use extra soap so you don’t get a infection.

Target, Shampoo Aisle
Overheard by That’s The Spirit!

Middle-aged balding man to friend as fireworks begin: Dude, I just love the plate tectonics of these fireworks.
Friend: You mean pyrotechnics?? Are you stupid?

Music in Plymouth
Overheard by powerful fireworks, indeed.

Priest (upon seeing the long line in front of Grand Ole Creamery): Holy Christ!

Grand Ole Creamery
Overheard by a recovering Catholic.