50-something lady to husband: Last time I peed only 2 tablespoons came out.  Don’t you think I’m dehydrated?

MN State Fair, Culligan Water Booth
Overheard by Was that measurement accurate?

Blunt woman, to friend: You’re looking slightly more puffy today.
Friend: I think it’s all these mini-donuts.

MN State Fair
Overheard by or the cookies. or the pronto pups. or the cheese curds.

Woman, pointing at Food Building: I think there are a bunch of restaurants in there.

Minnesota State Fair
Overheard by You think?

Male friend to female friend: See, I told you it wasn’t a pigeon!

Minneapolis, Uptown
Overheard by Thanks for finding my African Grey Parrot!

Large women pushing stroller: Al Franken. (pauses for a wide-smile) You son of a bitch.

MN State Fair outside the Franken Booth
Overheard by Sass McFrass.

Asshole Coworker: I don’t tip delivery drivers because they’re from companies that charge a delivery fee.  I’m already paying extra, why should I have to tip them?
Stunned Coworker: You are a cheap bastard!  Those drivers depend on tips for a living!
Asshole Coworker: They make a living wage, why should I feel bad for not tipping them?  If they make minimum wage, that’s over $13,000 a year.  Get a couple roommates and that’s definitely livable.
Stunned Coworker: WHAT?  They don’t make minimum wage, and they depend on tips to make up the difference.
Asshole Coworker: Okay, but really, what is $2.00 from me going to do for them?
Stunned Coworker: Again, you are such a cheap bastard.

Eden Prairie, Office
Overheard by Man that dude is cheap.

College Senior from Wisconsin to group of college friends: Is George W. Bush still President?

Wabasha, Fat Fest
Overheard by Really?!?

Man in car: I’ll have a hot fudge sundae and a cherry pie.
McDonald’s worker: Anything else?
Man in car: A diet coke.

Eagan, McDonald’s drive thru
Overheard by your mom.

Drunk hippie dude to very busty sober girl: HEYYYY, Big Boobs!
Busty sober girl: Hey, Small Cock! See? Stating the obvious isn’t always the way to go with pick up lines, now move along.

Excelsior, Bayside Grille
Overheard by ooooh Burn.

20-something chick: Once I get it in one hole, I can’t get it in the other one.
20-something dude: Here, let me help.

Dunwoody express bus from state fair
Overheard by Thanks again, Blackberry!

Guy: Look at those udders.  I wonder if it’s hard to walk?
Girl: It must be weird to be a cow.

MN State Fair
Overheard by Comfortably Human.

Woman Barging Her Way through Fair Group on Her Cell Phone: And we found out it ISN’T a UTI. But that means much worse.

MN State Fair
Overheard by Congrats?