Liquor store customer, loudly: Where you got them cans of Hurricane at?
Liquor store clerk: We don’t sell cans of Hurricane.
Liquor store customer, slightly quieter: Where you got them bottles of Hurricane at?
Liquor store clerk: Those are right over there. 

Chicago-Lake Liquors, noon
Overheard by Stop, you’re making me thirsty.

Woman gossiping about coworker: Why don’t they just give her disability? Then she can go drink at night.

Minneapolis, bus stop

25-year old woman: That’s right, Chanhassen is home to both AmericInn headquarters and Prince! Put that in your twat and smoke it!

Chanhassen, American Legion
Overheard by Denard Span.

Girl #1: Are you in here?
Girl #2: Yeah, I’m over here, and guess what? Good news!
Girl #1: You’re all good?
Girl #2: Yeah!

Women’s restroom during Vikings game
Overheard by Now we all know the good news.

25-year old man, searching for words to describe how amazingly drunk he got last weekend: We were fucking… shit… fuck… annihilated.
Other 25-year old guy: Wow. That really does sound drunk!

Minneapolis, West 26th St & Blaisdell
Overheard by FSFA’d.

Toddler: Mom, I like that guy ’cause he has a cool head.
His mom: What guy?
Toddler: That guy.

Saint Paul, Lex-Ham
Overheard by the guy with a cool head.

Oversharing teenager: I found a pubic hair on my sweatshirt!

Winsted, Your friendly neighborhood high school
Overheard by A grossed-out teacher.