25th August 2008

Where Exactly Is “Somewhere”?

Mid 50’s year old Woman: I would really rather lose a digit somewhere on my body.

Saint Paul, Highland Park Old Country Buffet
Overheard by Guy who just wanted a piece of cake.

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25th August 2008

Really Bad Sex

20 something hick to wife: Hey, ‘dis backseat big enough for sex?

MN State Fair, Saturn Car Tent
Overheard by And I thought I was going to get sick from the food…

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25th August 2008

Pretty Much The Same Thing

Early-20’s Emo/Preppy guy answering cell: Hi! We’re at the mall… I mean fair.

MN State Fair
Overheard by Wowsers.

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25th August 2008

Next Year

Man, loudly: I want to see a three nutted man!

MN State Fair
Overheard by fireyram.

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25th August 2008

Are You Sure That’s His Mother?

Small child: I don’t wanna go!
Mother: If you stay here someone is gonna kidnap you. And then you’ll never see grandma again!

MN State Fair

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24th August 2008

Why Do People Think This Is Okay?

Drunk 40 year old dude #1, standing in line for the bathroom: Well, there are 4 sinks. We only need 2 with the number of people I’ve seen wash their hands.
Drunk 40 year old dude #2: Yeah. There was this one time I was peeing in the sink at home, and my wife walked in. She was pissed. Good times.

Minnesota Zoo - Music In the Zoo
Overheard by slight overshare.

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24th August 2008

Who Doesn’t?!

Girl greeting an approaching friend: Omigawd! I LOVED those monkeys!

Minneapolis, Merlin’s Rest at happy hour
Overheard by I swear, I’d only had one drink.

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24th August 2008

Actually, That Is Worse

Female Hipster: Forget about the World Trade Center, Clay Aiken just reproduced!

Minneapolis, Local Boutique
Overheard by yes, forget about the world trade center.

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24th August 2008

At Least Until You Wash Your Hands

Woman yelling to a man: Stop touching my face!

Outside Palmers, Cedar/Riverside ‘hood
Overheard by hmmm.

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24th August 2008

Are There Pictures?

Owner: That’s Korean magazine. You won’t understand.
Old, white lady: Maybe.

Bloomington, Nails and Co
Overheard by J.Cusack.

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24th August 2008

This Kid Needs A Book

Boy, about man in Joe Montana jersey: Why is that guy wearing a Hannah Montana jersey?

Metrodome
Overheard by my jersey is pink.

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24th August 2008

It’s About Time!

Moviegoer in the silence before Tropic Thunder starts: Texas public school teachers can now have guns.

Block E
Overheard by aeh.

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24th August 2008

Happy Cows Don’t Live In Minnesota

Young boy petting baby cow: Mommy, I wish I was a cow!

Cattle Barn, MN State Fair
Overheard by does he like the smell?

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24th August 2008

Today’s Lesson: Troublemakers Are Never Jewish

Tattoo artist (to girl who is getting a peace sign tattoo): Oh, so you’re one of those peacemaker type people?
Girl: Yep.
Tattoo artist: Are you getting anything else on it?
Girl: Yeah, some Hebrew lettering eventually.
Tattoo artist: You Jewish?
Girl: No.  I just like Hebrew.
Tattoo artist: Why don’t you get it in a language that troublemakers can read?  Like Iraqi!  (gets excited) Yeah!  Get it in Muslim instead, then all those motherfuckers will know what you’re trying to say!

Minneapolis, Ace Tattoo
Overheard by a.lil.

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24th August 2008

Take Notes, Kids

Man walking down the street with two little boys, on cell phone: Yeah, we’re just, uh… sitting down finishing lunch right now.
Little boy, loudly: NO WE AREN’T!

Grand Marais, The street…not a restaurant
Overheard by BURN.

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24th August 2008

Without Replaceable Parts

Guy watching a dog spay: It’s just like working on a car.

State Fair Pet  Center
Overheard by Only with more living parts.

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24th August 2008

That’s Later

Very tall 20 something boyfriend sounding crushed: Don’t pat me like that, you treat me like a horse.
Girlfriend: I wanted you to go faster, it’s not like I took a riding crop to your ass.

MN State Fair
Overheard by who wears the pants.

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24th August 2008

The Reason They Entered Their Profession

Teenage boy to two teenage girls in an excited whisper: I have had 15 goats and 2 cows named after the KARE11 News team.

KARE11 booth at the State Fair
Overheard by my plant is named after Sven.

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23rd August 2008

That’s A Pronto Pup

Disgusted Teenage girl: I can, like, smell the obesity here.

MN State Fair
Overheard by well…yeah.

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23rd August 2008

Just Loud Enough

Guy on his cell phone loudly: She’s bangin’ two other guys besides him! And they all know about each other! I wouldn’t want to park my car in her garage if you know what I’m sayin’. Am I being too loud??

Chanhassen, Applebees
Overheard by Yes…just a little.

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