Overly tan taco lover: So can you, like, get your fingers all the way around it? Like it’s a marble?  And it’s really close to the skin’s surface? Does pus ooze out around it? How old is she? Maybe it has been growing like that for a while now?

Richfield, Taco Bell
Overheard by i think i am done with my crunch wrap supreme.

Kitchen staff on smoke break out back: I gotta let my toe heal so they can amputate it.

St Paul, Bulldog Lowertown
Overheard by it needs to heal before you cut it off?

Coworker to another: If you want, you guys could come over to my house and hang out while I take a shower.

Lakeville, The office
Overheard by Should I sit in the tub or on the toilet?

Half drunk man at the bar: Why are you wearing a teardrop on a necklace?  Did you kill someone?
Young woman waiting for a drink: It’s from Tiffany’s.

St. Paul, Plum’s Bar
Overheard by But did you kill someone to get it?

Man to driver on a jam packed 6 bus during rush hour: Man, you can’t be letting any more people on cause its gettin’ kinda tense.

6, bus
Overheard by a more frequent rider.

Blonde to receptionist, pointing to a big jar of loose pills: What are you going to do with all those left-over vitamins?
Receptionist: I don’t know? Flush ‘em?
Blonde: You should totally take them to St Anne’s. Homeless people need Vitamin B, too!

Minneapolis, Dr’s Office
Overheard by: i think they need homes more than vitamins.

Disgusted, older woman not yet used to, or ready for Minnesota winters: It’s snowing AGAIN?!

White Bear Lake, Subway
Overheard by AA.

Young woman playing video games: Did I tell you I found my chex mix?

St Paul, Concordia University Call Center

Girl #1: You would probably have to be outside for a really long time for your eyeballs to freeze.
Girl #2:  Okay, bye!

St.Paul, Bethel University
Overheard by she’s reassured now.

Man Stumbling Into Apartment Elevator: Whaaa floor?
Twenty-something woman: Uh, two.
Man Stumbling Into Elevator: Man, that floor sucks.

Saint Paul, Just Another Downtown Apartment Building
Overheard by So why’d he get off on the same floor?

Nerdy guy, to friend: We could randomly break out into riverdance in the middle of travel.  (awkward silence) You know you want to.
Friend: No. Just, no.
Nerdy guy: Fine, then we can jazzercise!

St. Paul, Bethel University
Overheard by a.lil.

Ditzy girl, in plain view of the large “Mississippi River” sign: Heyyy, is this the Mississippi? Are we crossing the Mississippi?

Co-op bus to Northfield,  crossing the Mississippi
Overheard by peanut butter.

Overweight Coworker: I just downed that bag of chips like it was my job!

Minneapolis, Office
Overheard by Supposed to be in a weight loss contest.

Woman on cell phone: You’re the only guy in the program I’ve ever had sex with. I mean, most guys in NA are nasty.

Minneapolis, 94 Bus headed East
Overheard by isn’t that against the rules?

Clerk greeting incoming customer: How you doin?
Customer: I’m lovin’ you, baby, that’s why I’m here.

Minneapolis, Union Liquors
Overheard by I love this store, always an adventure.

Child, about 6: There aren’t any purple tennis shoes ANYWHERE!
Mom: We’ll just have to keep looking.
Child: It must be because Barack Obama’s President now.

Minneapolis, Downtown Skyways
Overheard by what do her parents talk about at dinner?

Drunk 20-something girl to club bouncer (slurring): Shake it like a salt shaker!

Downtown Minneapolis, outside a club near the metrodome
Overheard by umm no thanks.

Man: I think he wanted some fruit snacks.
Woman: What are fruit snacks?
Man: Um, snacks… made of fruit.
Woman: Oh, fruit snacks!

Minneapolis, Target
Overheard by fruit what now?

Woman waiting for coffee: You know my sister is a Playboy model?
Friend: (blank stare)
Woman waiting for coffee: Yeah! She sends me the pictures. I mean, she’s beautiful but I don’t wanna see that. And my brother, HE looks at those!
Friend: (blank stare)

Lino Lakes, Starbucks in Target
Overheard by Next In Line.

Chick Watching Shamwow Commercial: Damn, you could take that on a trip with you and piss into it!

Columbia Heights, Apartment Party
Overheard by Why the hell is my BlackBerry in Anoka County?!