Guy on cellphone: But goddamn Ponce de Leon.  You know what I mean?

Outside 331 club
Overheard by swift passerby.

Young Hipster: What do you recommend?
Bartender: (names off some fairly obscure beers…)
Young Hipster: Do you have anything that tastes kind of like PBR?
Bartender: Why don’t you just have a PBR?
Young Hipster: OK.

331 Club
Overheard by Alie.

Handlebar-Mustached Prick: I got up two hours early today so I could wax my my mustache before work.

331 Club

Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I don’t like French New Wave films.
Bearded man: Why’s that?
Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I just don’t like them.
Bearded man: I understand that, but can you give me a reason as to why you don’t like them?
Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I don’t need to give you a reason, I just know that I don’t like them. Like how I know I don’t like your beard, or the beer you’re drinking.
Bearded man: Oh, well I guess the velvet jacket solidifies your point.

331 Club/NE MPLS
Overheard by Antoine Doinel.

Guy: What does “laissez faire” mean?
Girl: It means “hands-off.”
Guy: Great, then these are laissez faire beers! My hands are off! Let the French pay for them, with their stupid fucking words.

331
Overheard by the wee monsieur.

Zombie #1 to Zombie #2: I recognize you from somewhere. Craigslist?

331 - Zombie Pub Crawl
Overheard by Aaron.