Posts Tagged ‘bars’
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It Is Minnesota
20-something guy waiting in line: So, this is where all the white people are.
Minneapolis, Cowboy Slim’s
Overheard by Caucasian passer-by. -
The World Revolves Around Someone New Every Day
Slightly drunk middle aged woman: I don’t think poor people deserve dental care. I just end up paying too much then.
Minneapolis, CC Club
Overheard by Amused&confused. -
This Is Going To Be A Fun Week
Nerd: That’s not what Spock sounds like!
Minneapolis, Uptown Bar
Overheard by An Invisible Vulcan. -
Want To Borrow Some?
Loud 20 something lady referring to her friend: She’s all sorts of titties in the front.
20 something sitting next to her: What?
Loud 20 something lady: Yeah, she came into my work and I was like, “Who’s boobs are you wearing?”Saint Paul, Wild Onion
Overheard by They do look nice in that shirt. -
This Is A Lot More Common Than I Thought
40-something woman to her cousin at the bar: I want you to meet my new boyfriend.
Cousin: That’s your new boyfriend? That guy is our cousin!
40-something woman: Yeah, the state doesn’t agree with what we’re doing, but we figure since we’re both fixed it can’t hurt nothin’.Alexandria, local bar
Overheard by I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit. -
Who Had This Double Date Idea?
Man from couple #1: So, we’re starting an investment club.
Woman from couple #2: You mean grabbing ass?
Man from couple #1: Huh? No, an investment club.
Woman from couple #2: But that’s what you guys call it, right? Grabbing ass?
Man from couple #1: No, like, a REAL business; an investment club.
Woman from couple #2: Oh, right. Can I join?
Man from couple #1: No.St. Paul, McGoverns Pub
Overheard by Really real? -
Or If You Weren’t As Hot
Drunk guy to drunk girl: If you were a guy you would completely intolerable.
St. Paul, Eagles Club (Drinking With Ian taping)
Overheard by Wednesday. -
Can’t Do That Twice
Middle Aged Woman #1: By the way, I like your hair!
Middle Aged Woman #2: Oh, thanks! I got drunk and cut it myself!Minneapolis, Grumpys NE
Overheard by glad I picked Grumpys for my after-school beer venue. -
Let Me Call Home To Ask My Wife
50 something male: Yeah, I don’t have the wife, kids, dog, and house, but I can do whatever I want whenever I want. I’m fine. I’m happy. Do you want to go outside and get high?
Minneapolis, Grumpy’s
Overheard by New Shoes. -
This Night Didn’t End Well
Sconi Girl: Fuck, I’ve got gut rot.
Rockabilly Gutter Punk: I’ve got some Skoal.
Sconi Girl: Ehhh, I’m a Copi girl.Minneapolis, Nomad
Overheard by Dernell and Vayrose. -
Sorry, You’re Just Not My Type
30′s Girl: Hi, I’m Sarah*. I’m not going to take my top off, but I’m Sarah.
Minneapolis, Nye’s Saturday Night
Overheard by The proof is under the shirt! -
Yahoo Answers Is Not The Place For Research
Drunk dude at bar: She didn’t like him because he is a gender racist.
Minneapolis, CC Club
Overheard by Uh, do you mean “sexist”? -
Try Just One First
Drunk Girl: I’m really sad that I can’t do cartwheels when I’m drunk. I think I will stop drinking.
Minneapolis, The Dakota
Overheard by whatever it takes. -
We’re Not Sure
Young Asian Male greeting another Young Asian Male: Wha’ sup, Niggah?!
Nearby Young White Male: Did I hear that right? Or was that Chinese?Saint Paul, Camp Bar
Overheard by didn’t realize it was trans-cultural. -
The Last Doctor In The Family
Meat head at the bar sunday morning: If my dad is a physician, does that make him a doctor?
Minneapolis, Herkimer
Overheard by Amazed by meat heads. -
Tips From The Pros
Square Jawed College Boy: I don’t wear pants before noon.
Minneapolis, Bryant Lake Bowl
Overheard by I wish I had your life. -
I Take It Back
Grandma: Ooh, look at that animal!
Little girl: It’s a deer!
Grandma: Very good, and what about that one?
Little girl: A mooooooooooooooooose.
Grandma (laughing and pointing to a bison head): You’re so smart! And what about that one?
Little girl (loud enough for everyone to hear): A BUTTHEAD!Minneapolis, Sergeant Prestons
Overheard by drinking under the butthead. -
Maybe I’ll Get A Mask!
Drink girl to friend: Seriously! I need to get better at being incognito drunk!
Minneapolis, The Library
Overheard by a.lil. -
Hoping For His Retirement Is Not Dramatic Enough
Man watching old baseball game on TV announced by Joe Buck: Oh, I hate Joe Buck, why can’t he just be one of those guys who has a terrible accident and dies?
Minneapolis, hotel bar
Overheard by Tim McCarver. -
That Should Make Her Regret Her Decision
Fat nerdy guy: Dude, yeah, I’m totally bisexual. If she won’t have sex with me, I’ll buy it!
Minneapolis, CC Club
Overheard by he must spend a lot of money…
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