Posts Tagged ‘bloomington’
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Especially For Him
Nurse leaving clinic: It’s a good thing we had that trainee in today. That kid had, like, five bags of coke in him. It’s a good learning experience for everyone that way.
Bloomington, a clinic
Overheard by Kay Jay Aye. -
I Always Get The Urge To Pee
Guy in mid-twenties: If I’m going to put my arm around another guy, I have to cross my legs, too.
Bloomington, Southtown Bowling Alley
Overheard by Back to back. -
Hearing What I Want To
Early 20-something guy to his early 20-something girlfriend as she tries on heels: They look small. What size are they?
Girlfriend: 7.
Boyfriend: What size are you?
Girlfriend: 8.
Boyfriend: Will you wear them? They’ll hurt you too much you’ll never wear them.
Girlfriend: You’re right, they’re too expensive. I won’t get them.Bloomington, Bloomingdale’s shoe department
Overheard by Active Listener. -
As You Wish
Older woman on cell phone in bathroom: My UTI is EVERYBODY’S problem!!
Bloomington, Corp office building
Overheard by It’s not MY problem. -
You Should Do What She Says
Large black woman to her young son: Get over here you little niglet or I’ll knock you stupid.
Bloomington, IHOP
Overheard by entertained white guy. -
No, That’s Not It
Woman shopping, to younger guy in a suitcoat and jeans: Do you work here?
Younger guy: No, I’m just good looking.Bloomington, Macy’s coats
Overheard by Staciaann. -
Yeah We Do
50-something woman, about the loud noise during a turn: Uh-oh! Sounds like we’ve got a loose wheel!
Bloomington, Lightrail
Overheard by Sounds like you’ve got a loose wheel. -
Has Anyone Written A Book About Him Or Something?
One 7th grade boy to another: I didn’t know Martin Luther King Jr. was black!
Bloomington, Middle School
Overheard by scared for the future of education. -
Would You Like To Smell Them?
Disheveled man to friend: Those shoes look really comfortable. What are those, like, deer wool?
Bloomington, Perkins
Overheard by Wearing a Sheep fur t-shirt. -
Girls Love Bad Boys
Blond girl to friend: I would go out with him but I heard he was going to be deported soon.
Friend: Really? That sounds cool! Is he hot?Bloomington, Jefferson high school
Overheard by I’d go out with him too. -
The Real Banana Suit
Order-announcer-gal: Will the guy in the banana suit come up? Your pizza is ready.
Bloomington, Davanni’s
Overheard by Everyone needs a banana suit. -
You Should Be Taking Pictures; This Won’t Last
Mom to 4 year old daughter: Don’t put makeup on your brother! (pause) Quit kissing your brother! (3 and 4 year old keep kissing and applying makeup)
Bloomington, Bike Shop
Overheard by Solidarity for oppressed youth… -
Feeling That Wave Of Nausea Yet?
Girl talking to a group of coworkers: If I even see a scab on any of you, watch out because I will come after you and I will pick it.
Bloomington, Office
Overheard by I can’t believe she said that loud enough for others to hear in the office. -
Are There Pictures?
Owner: That’s Korean magazine. You won’t understand.
Old, white lady: Maybe.Bloomington, Nails and Co
Overheard by J.Cusack. -
I’m Halfway To My Goal
Guy #1: You smell like urine.
Guy #2: GOOD!28th Avenue park and ride
Overheard by Time for a shower? -
I Have A Pretty Good Idea
Coworker: How is it that guys always micons… miscons… miscon… blow the shit out of proportion?
Office in Bloomington
Overheard by porky pig anyone? -
Jealous?
Older woman: Now that the fireworks have started, they’re probably having crazy sex in the port-a-potties!!
Bloomington Summer Fete
Overheard by pocavontas. -
Please Bring Me With You
Middle aged black woman with her grandchildren at 11:30am on a Sunday: I just took the kids out to breakfast and now I need to go home and have me a Jack Daniels.
Southtown Target
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Out Of The Question
Girl #1: Whenever I drink, my kidney hurts the next day.
Girl #2: Um, maybe you shouldn’t drink so much.In the Sheraton lobby during Convergence
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Wild
College-bound Girl: I don’t need an ironing board; I got one at the Senior Party!
Ikea
Overheard by An Invisible Fiend.
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