Club going girl to her friends: Gross, I have period stain.

Burnsville, Perkins
Overheard by questioning my sexuality for the first time ever.

5 yr old boy at Victoria’s Secret: I don’t like it here.
Mom: But just look at all the friendly people.

Burnsville Center
Overheard by A “friendly” person.

Man walking up to the register at the dollar tree holding a pair of headphones: How much are these?
Cashier: A dollar.

Burnsville, The Dollar tree
Overheard by But for you…$1.75.

Mom: …then I’d have to kill you.
Daughter: Why?
Mom: Because that’s my job as a mother.

Burnsville, Macy’s
Overheard by Glad I’m not her daughter.

Woman, upon opening a bag of Doritos:  Shiiiit.  This bag of chips is only half full.

Burnsville, Super America
Overheard by Should have read the fine print.

Teenage kid, to the rest of his table: I like STD’s more than STR’s

Burnsville Perkins
Overheard by dislikes both equally.

A woman helping another woman jump start her car: Now, do I start my car first er…?

Burnsville parking lot

Teen Girl #1: Yeah, sometimes my, like, face spasms.
Teen Girl #2: My eye sometimes does that.

Outside Madeline Rose in Burnsville
Overheard by You had me at spasm.

Checkout lady while ringing up melamine lunch trays: We have these! My kids love ‘em. They like to pretend they are in jail. Give me some of that slop, mom!

Burnsville Target
Overheard by your mom.

Man eating with his family: …so when she took her home pregnancy test, she accidentally peed all over the counter. When he confronted her, she lied about it, and also told him she wasn’t pregnant.  But then my sister told him that she was actually pregnant.

Denny’s in Burnsville
Overheard by just trying to enjoy my meat scrambler.

Ghetto girl from backseat of a friends car at McDonald’s drive-thru yelling at the worker: All I wanted was normal ass cheese on my McChicken! Where is my normal ass piece of cheese?

Burnsville
Overheard by It was funny till he screwed up my order too.

Little blonde pre-school girl: I’m stronger than Jesus!

River Hills Church in Burnsville
Overheard by Tomorrow’s lesson is on blasphemy.

One wasted musician to another: I don’t know how she got pregnant. She must have sat down on my computer sock.

Renegades in Burnsville
Overheard by an equally drunk patron.

Preppy girl: Man, I hate this new dress code.  I can’t wear anything now.
Preppy girl’s friend: At least they didn’t give us uniforms.  I mean, that’d force us to look good everyday.  You can’t just look like crap in a uniform and pull that look off.

Bus leaving Burnsville High School

Teacher: You consider 300 a good date movie?

Burnsville High School
Overheard by Some Econ Kids.

Loud obnoxious server to her co-worker: I’m pregnant and my husband calls me “chubbers” now. The other night he was all, like, “HEY CHUBBERS! YOU GONNA COME TO BED OR DO I NEED TO GET A FORKLIFT TO GET YOU OFF OF THE COUCH!?”

Perkins off of Burnsville Parkway
Overheard by I don’t care and neither does anyone else in the restaurant.

Lit Class Substitute Teacher: Did I hear that correctly? “Please don’t rape me with your feelings”?

Burnsville High School
Overheard by Yep, your hearing is perfect.

Study Hall Girl: We’re reading a bunch of Africa books. All they talk about is urine.

Burnsville High School
Overheard by I’m sure that’s not ALL they talk about.

Mother shouting from car to her husband in Super America: GET ME SOME CHOCOLATE!

Super America - CR 5 In Burnsville
Overheard by Hey - Me too!

Study Hall Girl #1: I’m going to kick your bottom!
Study Hall Girl #2: Sounds uncomfortable.

Burnsville High School
Overheard by Keeping it G-rated.