21st January 2008

Did They Tell You Not To Say That Out Loud?

Antique Store Employee: I hear little voices.

Antiques Minnesota in Burnsville
Overheard by I hear them too.

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13th January 2008

So I’m Going To Just Live With My Parents Forever

Bookish Teen Girl: As a general rule, I’m nonmigratory.

Burnsville High School
Overheard by Me too.

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10th January 2008

Charity Won’t Want It After That

Latina Girl: That’s so cute, you should, like, cut it off and give it to charity.

Language Arts Commons Burnsville High School
Overheard by If I had a nickle for every time I heard that one…

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9th January 2008

Don’t Get Used To It

Teenage Guy: I think my boobs are getting less saggy!

Burnsville High School
Overheard by Maybe it’s just getting cold in here.

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27th December 2007

Delicious In Potato Soup

Young woman walking out of Christmas Eve mass: When I was in high school, our senior prank was stealing the communion wine. We stole three huge jugs.
2nd young woman walking with her: Did they get the Jesus crackers too?!

Risen Savior Catholic Church, Burnsville
Overheard by Jesus crackers? Really???

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26th December 2007

I’d Love To Read Some Of Your Poetry

High School Guy: I have so much pent-up emotion!

18th Birthday Party in Burnsville
Overheard by Just Let it Out, Man.

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26th December 2007

The PG Version

Wife: Could you just shove that –
Husband: Where the sun don’t shine?

JC Penny’s Burnsville Center
Overheard by I think that violates the return policy.

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26th December 2007

It Must Be So Exhausting

Female Shopper: I took one look at him and I was like, “Ugh, I’m sorry.”

JC Penny’s Burnsville Center
Overheard by I thought beauty was only skin deep.

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18th December 2007

What If It’s Magic?

Middle aged woman customer #1: It looks like Santa’s been drinking.
Cashier: Maybe Santa’s been celebrating a little early this year.
Middle aged woman customer #2: It looks like he has a lazy eye.
Cashier: Don’t be hatin’ on the lazy eye.

Walgreens on the corner of Hwy 13 and Cliff in Burnsville
Overheard by The Cashier Didn’t Even Have a Lazy Eye.

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27th November 2007

Discovering New Words For It All The Time

Woman in the next stall making loud scratching noises: DAMN, what the fuck is that?!!! Ooooh shit!

New Burnsville Target bathroom
Overheard by I’m for sure not ever gonna use that stall.

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13th November 2007

Why Does Everything Have To Be So Complicated?

Blonde Clinique Sales Girl (to Brunette Clinique Sales Girl): So what is a Santa Bear? Is it, like, a bear… that looks like… Santa?

Macy’s Burnsville
Overheard by And you work at Macy’s???

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26th August 2007

Does Anything Exist North Of Burnsville?

Office Hen Betty (talking about her upcoming trip to Duluth from Owatonna): How am I going to get through the cities with that 35W bridge down?
Office Hen Wilma: Oh, whatever you do, DO NOT take 280! The traffic is terrible.
Office Hen Betty: Really? Have you driven on it?
Office Hen Wilma: No, but that’s the main detour. I just assume it’s busy.
Office Hen Betty: Well, how will I get through?
Office Hen Thelma: I dunno, girl. 94?
Exasperated Male Coworker: Just take 35E!!!
Office Hen Betty: You can do that?

The office in Lakeville
Overheard by Smooth G.

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19th August 2007

I Hear Meth Works Well.

Teenage girl trying on swimsuits: I’d be really skinny if it weren’t for all this fat.

Macy’s Burnsville
Overheard by You already look like a damn Olsen Twin.

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15th July 2007

And Irrational Paranoia.

20 something Guy #1: They are just trying to control you.. .you know that right?
20 something Guy #2: (mumbles)
20 something Guy #1: I’m telling you, it’s all about control.

arcade in the Burnsville Center
Overheard by Just here to Shop.

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15th July 2007

Is This Good News Or Bad News?

Customer in line behind me(recognizing the Clerk as an old friend): HEEEYYYY!!
Convenience Store Clerk (obviously surprised to see Customer): Whoa! I didn’t expect to see you here!
Customer: Didn’t you hear? I just got out of jail 3 days ago!

SA in Burnsville
Overheard by just gimme my speedy rewards points.

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26th April 2007

Nevermind That, What Is He Going To Hit It With?

Guy #1: I’m going to go hit that squirrel over there!
Guy #2: Umm, that is not a squirrel, its a chipmunck.
Guy #1: Squirrel, chipmunck, same thing!
Guy #2: Ehh, no they’re not.
Guy #1: The hell they aren’t!

Burnsville Park
Overheard by I wonder if he knows the difference between other animals too?

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30th October 2006

Clearly.

Very “non-judgemental” person: Those religious people are the judgemental ones!

Holiday Inn Burnsville
Overheard by Pam.

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27th July 2006

She Was Talking About The Drain Clog They Cleared Together.

Woman to husband (coming out of bathroom together): That was good, but I think we’ve had better.

Ciatti’s/Chianti Grill in Burnsville
Overheard by the Hostess at the front desk.

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