Posts Tagged ‘coffee shops’
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How Can You Be Sure?
Mom to son: No, they did not put butt powder on your doughnut!
Minneapolis, outside Audubon Coffee
Overheard by Thought that felt familiar. -
When Do You Think She Remembered The Rest?
Hipster Girl #1: Deaf people compose music all of the time. Stevie Wonder, duh.
Hipster Girl #2: Oh. I forgot about him.Minneapolis, Patio at Plan B
Overheard by Cursed Tea. -
I’ve Seen Those Things Ruin Lives
Guy studying Swedish: I’m really tweakin’ out from this blueberry Italian soda.
Minneapolis, Dinkytown Espresso Royale
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Like You Didn’t Think It Was Funny
Girl: Oh my God you guys, I’m totally looking at Craiglist right now and there’s totally an ad that says, “Need tranny work done!”
Boy: Uhmm, I think that means transmission.
Girl: I know, but STILL!St. Paul, Cahoots
Overheard by seriously need a mechanic. -
To Whom?!
30-something woman to her women friend: So, then he smiled at me and I realized he had fangs just like a vampire.
Friend: Well, weren’t you by the caves?
30-something woman: Yes, what does that have to do with it?
Friend: Don’t vampires like to sleep in caves?
30-something friend: Yes, well I suppose that makes sense then.Minneapolis, in line at Caribou on Nicollet Mall and 11th
Overheard by The crazies are out again for the summer. -
I’ll Tell Them Because I’m Just DYING For Someone To Talk To
Loud girl to her male companion: If ONE more person asks me if I have a penis…
Minneapolis, Blue Moon Coffeehouse
Overheard by Well, do you? -
She’s Restoring My Faith In Humanity
A Preschool Girl to her mom: So what if Burt and Ernie are in love? They are orange and yellow.
Minneapolis, Anodyne coffee shop
Overheard by out of the mouths of babes. -
That’s Going To Hurt Some Feelings
Girl: You say outlandish statements ALL the time!
Guy: When was the last time you heard me say anything outlandish?
Girl: You just said “it was the best thing since wrestling”! You are the ONLY person who watches the WWF anymore!Minneapolis, Espresso Royale in Dinkytown
Overheard by An amused iced tea drinker. -
How Do You Feel About This?
Coffee shop regular: You know, I’ve come to the conclusion that Obama is the result of stem cell research.
The Bean Factory, Randolph Ave, St. Paul
Overheard by jessikate. -
Something Like That
Customer: You put the right amount of whipped cream on it. The dude you have working here never puts enough on.
Barista: Oh, you mean the retarded guy?St Paul, Caribou in Byerly’s on Suburban
Overheard by smoooth d. -
They Know That, Too
Middle-aged woman overly caffeinated on espresso: Damn Canadians, I just don’t get it, but they know everything. They KNOW EVERYTHING.
Minneapolis, Dinkytown Coffee Shop
Overheard by L. -
With Your Staff Looking On
One business man to his three potential business partners: Businesses don’t make decisions out in the public sphere, it’s like sex; it’s done in private meeting rooms.
Minneapolis, Second Moon Cafe
Overheard by Step into my office… -
Where Did You Get That Idea?
Sheltered Girl with a thick Wisconsin accent: Do you guys have animals in Japan? Like, livestock?
Minneapolis, Uptown Dunn Bros.
Overheard by I’m sorry this is who you got stuck with, Japanese exchange student. -
Yeah, I’ve Blocked Much Of It Out, Too
Girl, looking up from newspaper: We chose hope over fear?! Was it ever really in question?
Man: And how did it come down to those two choices, hope and fear. What were the other choices that were eliminated first?Edina, Caribou on Xerxes
Overheard by Lord Williams. -
He’s Happy To Hear That
Ditzy College Girl: She’s nice, but what she lacks in hands, she makes up for in Jesus.
Saint Paul, Coffee News
Overheard by I dated one of those. -
Just Barely
Middle aged man in slacks: I mean, they’re not Christians, but they’re still good people.
Saint Louis Park, Caribou Coffee
Overheard by Reginald. -
Grow A Whole Fruit Salad
Teenage Girl (to friend): You know how guys are always telling other guys to “grow a pair”? The first time I heard that I thought they meant “grow a PEAR,” and I was like, why a pear? What’s wrong with an apple? Or a bana… oh.
Stillwater, Starbucks
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Portland
Bearded Man in a Suit and Spectacles: I can’t tell if my friend is from Portland or autistic.
Minneapolis, Hard Times Cafe
Overheard by S.M. -
I Blame The Media For Everything
20-something woman to her friend: I know it’s the media! The press talk about it so much, then poof, my 401k disappears and I can’t afford my house.
St. Paul, Caribou
Overheard by howlin’ wolf. -
You’re Going To Have To Settle For The Real Thing
Barista at a coffee shop: Can I help you, sir?
Man in his mid to late fifties: Ahh, yes. Do you have, ahh, something like coffee?St. Paul, White Rock coffee shop
Overheard by the man with the mohawk.
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