Woman on phone: It’s doing what? [pause] No, I’m not bringing you a hammer. [pause] No, you can’t destroy it. I don’t care if it keeps making noise. I’m not going to bring you a hammer!

Court International
Overheard by I’ll bring the hammer.

Office lady #1 talking about the Shred-it company: They need to come more often.
Office lady #2: Don’t we all.

Court International
Overheard by ummmm.