Posts Tagged ‘dining’
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And Nobody Knows How To Pretend
Diner in next booth: It isn’t always the big fights on stage that hurts performers; there was one case where a woman got slapped every night for one run and she went deaf in her ear on that side. People don’t realize how important fight coordinators are for safety.
Saint Paul, Chatterbox in Highland
Overheard by Cat. -
It’s A Mystery We Hope To Solve Soon
Elderly hockey fan surveying the crowd: These people all look so… Midwestern.
Bloomington, Joe Senser’s
Overheard by What did you expect? -
It’s Like Cliff Notes
Girl: Well, I never really understood Pride and Prejudice but I liked Bridget Jones’ Diary and they both have a Mr. Darcy and they both have Colin Firth in them.
Guy: Don’t worry, if you’ve read or seen Bridget Jones’ Diary then you’ve essentially read Pride and Prejudice.Minneapolis, Butter
Overheard by Concerned English Major. -
He Lived Dangerously
Woman to her male dinner companion: Is this the sort a place you came to when you were on the lam or are there too many people here?
Minneapolis, Rudolphs
Overheard by njs. -
Someone Change Her Batteries
Young woman to slumped, unresponsive man: And so I was talking with them and everyone’s getting their turn at talking, but I was talking to them and we’re just talking, you know, and everything’s fine. You know? And I was talking because I’m talking, and I like to talk, I like to talk with them, and they’re talking. And I’m talking, and I don’t think I’m talking too much, because they’re talking. They’re talking, we’re all talking, I’m giving everyone their turn to talk because I don’t like to dominate the conversation.
Edina, Edina Grill
Overheard by sxoidmal. -
All Their Friends Received Homemade Gifts This Year
Hipster at neighboring table: OOOhhh! THAT kind of mushroom farm. I thought you were talking about a legitimate mushroom farm.
St. Louis Park, Yangtze Restaurant
Overheard by hormelcooking. -
The Perfect Compliment To Cheerios
Mom: What do you want to drink?
Little boy, about 6 years old: Beer!St. Louis Park, Panera Bread
Overheard by I want one too. -
But It Brings So Much Joy
Server, walking to the next birthday table after they sang to my dad: God, I hate doing this.
Burnsville, TGI Fridays
Overheard by I would too, if I had your job. -
We All Need To Be Proud Of Something
40 year old woman, to her family (including kids) as she enters: The only thing he’s good at is impregnating women.
St. Paul, a hole in the wall Italian restaurant
Overheard by More vino please. -
This Is All You Ever Need To Know
13 year old boy: The secret is to find someone who has something wrong with them that you can deal with!
Saint Paul, La Cabana
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Adding “Healthy Self Esteem” To The Things I’m Thankful For
Blonde Girl, about upcoming holidays: I’m not going to not eat the things I like, I’m just going to throw up.
Maple Grove, Noodles & Company
Overheard by Stunned. -
If It’s Not Adam Lambert Then I Don’t Care!
Teen Girl #1, referring to Cab Calloway song playing from overhead speakers: Ugh! What IS this music?
Teen Girl# 2: Uh, Opera.St. Paul, restroom in Mancini’s Char House and Lounge
Overheard by Coco. -
It’s Not Easy For Them Either
20-something dude, while playing chess: It’s really hard to reassure someone that they are not a barracuda.
Minneapolis, Hard Times Cafe (Where else?)
Overheard by XprettyXsureXimXnotXaXbarracudaX. -
The Ad Said “Dealer Wanted“
Girl: So, he literally asks for heroin.
Guy: No way. What did you do?
Girl: Well, we didn’t hire him.Minneapolis, Uptown Green Mill
Overheard by Where do you work? -
Just Don’t Do It Here
Bartender: Alright, just need you to sign the bill.
Drunk 25-year old guy: Okay, but you better hold on to this signature. I’m gonna be famous. I’m gonna kill a lot of people someday. I’m gonna be more famous than Charlie Manson and Ted Bundy!Minneapolis, Green Mill
Overheard by Should I report him? -
He Knows What He’s Doing
Elderly man: I couldn’t do it myself.
Elderly woman: I’d imagine so!
Elderly man: So, I asked the pretty young nurse to help me out.
Elderly woman: That’s what they are there for!
Elderly man: All I needed her to do was hold back the flap of skin so I could get to it.Rochester, restaurant in a retirement home
Overheard by Waitress running to kitchen to laugh. -
That’s What She Said
Guy talking to two friends: I’m pretty much useless without a sword in my hands.
Minneapolis, Hard Times @ approx 2:30am
Overheard by glad he didn’t have a sword. -
Death By Vegetables
Elderly Woman, picking at her food: There’s no meat in this dish!
Elderly Man, eating his: Yep, they’re trying to murder us.Saint Paul, Grand Shanghai Restaurant
Overheard by Should’ve ordered the General Tso’s. -
But You Heard Me Say ‘No Offense’, Right?
Asian Guy: I only have a home phone.
White Co-Worker: No offense, but that’s strange; an Asian guy that DOESN’T own a cellphone?Mankato, Buffalo Wild Wings
Overheard by D.R.B. -
This Requires Much Deeper Analysis
College Frat Boy to Buddy: So, if you had a clone of yourself and you had sex with it, would that make you gay or just be masturbating?
Minneapolis, Bun Mi Sandwiches
Overheard by Or With The Cloned Sheep?
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