Posts Tagged ‘gas station’
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It’s A New Supplement I’ve Been Taking
Girl sitting in car: Is it cold out there?
Man pumping gas: Why? Do my nipples look hard?
Girl: Yes.
Man: My nipples are always hard.Woodbury, BP gas station
Overheard by my nipples are just fine, thanks. -
Hope It’s Cleaner
SA Cashier: I get more ass than a toilet seat.
St. Paul, Snelling Ave. Super America
Overheard by KC. -
We Haven’t Gotten There Yet
Father to daughter: I need your attention for a second.
Daughter: YOU HATE ME?!?!Oakdale, Super America
Overheard by hmmm, clean the ears. -
Feel The Sting
Teenage girl #1: This guy in my science class argued with me for twenty minutes about whether quaint was a word or not.
Father: Well, why didn’t you just get a dictionary and show him?
Teenage girl #1: They don’t have dictionaries in my science class.
Teenage girl #2: They don’t have bibles either. Bam! Roasted!Silver Lake, Gas Station
Overheard by The power of Christ compels you! -
A Waste Of A Weekend And A Hole
Guy: Yah, he was so sick last weekend, he couldn’t even stare down a hole.
Snelling & Summit SA
Overheard by Ed. -
What Mess Is That?
20 something man on his cell phone: Well, yeah. I was gonna ask her out but then I found out she voted for Obama. (pause) Yeah, she got us into this mess!
White Bear Lake, Gas Station
Overheard by Your vote REALLY counts. -
That Sounds Pretty Easy
Clerk #1: My mind is shot.
Clerk #2, seriously: Just unshoot it.Uptown Super America
Overheard by Let me just grab my un-gun… -
The Pessimist
Woman, upon opening a bag of Doritos: Shiiiit. This bag of chips is only half full.
Burnsville, Super America
Overheard by Should have read the fine print. -
It Should Be A Show About Gas Prices Going Down
Older Somali Woman: I can’t believe that we have to watch Fox News while at the gas station.
Younger Somali Woman: I know. It should be MTV.West Bank Gas Station
Overheard by Fox News seems oddly appropriate. -
Yes
Very Large Gangster to gas station employee: An angel at the pump told me I need to see you to pay inside. You think that’s a coincidence?
Holiday Station on Franklin Ave.
Overheard by Pickup lines don’t work. -
Just Preparing Him For Life
Elementary aged boy: I love the Wild and hockey is my favorite sport!!!!!
Little brother: Ok, but you are really bad at it.the Freedom station in Mahtomedi
Overheard by HEY-OH! -
Thanks For Stopping By! Don’t Come Back Soon!
Drunk Guy: You guys have a very limited burrito selection.
Clerk: Oh, well, why do you say that?
Drunk Guy: All you have is breakfast burritos. (pause) I think I have STDs.
Clerk: Why do you say that?
Drunk Guy: ‘Cause my penis hurts. (walks out)Holiday on Broadway in Forest Lake
Overheard by Stay away from my burritos… -
Doomed
20-something cashier #1: So, what’s up with the 4th of July? Why are we celebrating?
20-something cashier #2: Are you serious?
20-something cashier #1: Yeah, what’s up with the 4th of July?
20-something cashier #2: Uh, it’s our nation’s independence… you know, Independence Day?
20-something cashier #1: Oh, I didn’t know that.
20-something cashier #2: (shaking head) Wow.Gas station in Uptown
Overheard by Wow is right. I’m scared for America. -
All I Need To Know I Learned From Disney
Little girl, referring to Sikh man in front of her wearing a turban and traditional clothing: What kind of man is that mommy?
Mom: I think he is Middle Eastern.
Little girl: Is he is like Aladdin?
Mom: (a quiet) Shhh.waiting in line at SA in Minneapolis
Overheard by Wishing for more wishes. -
Nobody Ever Says No
Mother shouting from car to her husband in Super America: GET ME SOME CHOCOLATE!
Super America – CR 5 In Burnsville
Overheard by Hey – Me too! -
They Just Need Some Hugs
Emo guy: Seriously… about ‘patio’, why isn’t it pronounced like ‘ratio’? Like, hey, let’s go eat lunch on the pay-shee-o.
Equally emo girl: Yeah… learn about soft sounding T’s, bitches.gas station in anoka
Overheard by good grief guys, go home. -
Correction: Nobody Wants That
Gay man: Not everyone wants to have their uterus opened!
Gas Station near Arden Hills
Overheard by I’ll keep mine closed thank you.
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