(People are already sitting on Hennepin waiting for the parade to start)
Man to cop: What’s the best way to cross the street?
Cop: Uhh, you can cross it.
Man: Oh ok, thanks.
(Man crosses)
Cop, under his breath: Or, you can levitate across…

Aquatennial Parade, Hennepin and 9th
Overheard by Anna.

40-something guy: Man, does she have huge boobs or what?!

Hennepin Ave
Overheard by you know you all were thinking it.

Woman to man: You got your knife on you?
Man: Yeah.
Womand to man: Because I swear to God, I will slash your throat right now, you talk about my baby like that again. I will cut you.

Bus stop near Hennepin and 5th
Overheard by Just trying to get to the train station.

Early 20’s pregnant girl to baby daddy: I don’t think we can handle a pet.

Hennepin Ave
Overheard by Babies are way easier.

Cute brunette #1: I really think you should wait awhile before you go all the way with this guy.
Cute brunette #2: Dude, for sure! I’m going to wait a decent amount of time before I sleep with him.
Cute brunette #1 (smirking): What, like a week?
Cute brunette #2 (in a serious tone): No! Like two weeks.

Hennepin and 4th St.
Overheard by Good for you!

Teen girl screaming as she leans out the window of a school bus: STEVE!! (sits down giggling for 10 seconds then pops her head back out) I like it when you smile!!!!!

Traffic Jam on Hennepin Avenue by The Walker
Overheard by that’s… sweet?

Baristo: I dunno what was up with this guy…  He didn’t know how to set up a MySpace account!

Dunn Brothers, 34th and Hennepin
Overheard by ORLY.

Girl walking toward the parking ramp at bar time: Windbreaker, fancy windbreaker goddammit, fancy windbreaker, fancy windbreaker.

Hennepin Ave. and Lake Street, Uptown Minneapolis
Overheard by I know exactly what you mean.

Older, apparently wiser Valet, to younger Valet who is sitting on the curb, nodding and listening intently: This is a process, with many steps. See me now? I was once where you are.

Hennepin and 6th underground parking ramp
Overheard by I was once sitting on a curb myself.

Local stand-up comedian to Fancy Ray, while discussing his Lickety Split commercials: Screw the porn, I jerk off to Fancy Ray.
Second stand-up comedian: Yeah, but do you draw eyebrows on your nads first?

Outside of Brave New Workshop
Overheard by Did Fancy Ray ask YOU to hold his weenie, or am I just lucky?

Bus Driver: An autistic kid got lost in the forest. His parents just didn’t watch him for a second, and bam, he disappeared. It took them three days to find him, and he was still alive! A happy ending. I think that happened.
Woman: When?
Bus Driver: I dont know, sometime. I think it happened.

6 Line going south on Hennepin
Overheard by Shaheen.

(A bum gets off the bus after a girl gives him cash for fare)
College Guy: I think it’d be fun to study the money-scrounging ways of bums.
College Girl: *thoughtfully* Yeah, they’re good at it.
College Guy: Yeah.

9th and Hennepin on southbound 6 bus
Overheard by awe.

Scruffy white man: That motherfucker’s a liar!
Scruffy black lady: Hey! Don’t take the lord’s name in vain.

Southbound bus stop at Hennepin & 5th
Overheard by WWMFJD?

Older guy (pointing at Orpheum Theatre): They had that ice-skating chick there once!
Slightly younger guy: Halle Berry?
Older guy: Naw, it wasn’t her… the white chick!
Slightly younger guy: Jennifer Lopez?
Older guy: Naw… Dorothy Hamill! That’s who it was!

The #6 bus on Hennepin
Overheard by No wait, I think it’s Yao Ming!

Man on bus with no coat on a -30degree day: Wow, it’s cold.
Bus Driver: Where’s your coat man?
No coat guy: Coats are for sissies.
Bus Driver: Wow. Looks like you just got on the sissy bus.

6 bus going down Hennepin at 7:36am 02/20/08
Overheard by Anna.

Block E-loiterer #1: Lookit this mufugga. Nigga got on a Matrix coat.
Block E-loiterer #12: Yeah, mufugga probly got a sawed-off under that shit.

5th and Hennepin
Overheard by and I thought I looked like just another white guy leaving the office wearing a black topcoat.

Woman walking down the street: Well, we’re thinking of going to Mexico.
Woman #2: (in bored voice) Oh, Mexico. I went there once.

e hennepin ave
Overheard by you know you’re rich when…

Woman: Wow! You can see the whole city from here.

The Skyway over Hennepin Ave
Overheard by … If by city you mean part of Hennepin Ave, then yes.

Blond girl: Oh my god. I’m going to kill that bitch. And then I’m going to skin her alive.

Hennepin and Lake
Overheard by Amusée.

One hipster girl to another: And then you realized it was vomit everywhere.

Hennepin Ave
Overheard by oh goodness.