She’s Never Seen Demolition Man
Girl: I wonder how the humans had sex in Wall-E. I mean, they were in those chairs and couldn’t move, it was a big deal when the captain stood up!
Shady Oak Beach
Overheard by Robots.
Girl: I wonder how the humans had sex in Wall-E. I mean, they were in those chairs and couldn’t move, it was a big deal when the captain stood up!
Shady Oak Beach
Overheard by Robots.
Girl #1: Let’s play guess the color!
Girl #2: Ok, yellow, red, orange, um, blue, six? (pause) Oh wait, damn.
Shady Oak Beach
Overheard by Jane’s lover.
Crowd of teenage girls galloping forward with sticks and fists in the air: FOR NARNIA!!!!
Hopkins High School
Overheard by who knew early morning cross country practice could be this much fun?
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Gentleman: I’m not worried about the police.
Billy and the Old Man, Hopkins
Overheard by someone who is.
Girl on Phone: Hey girl! I just got done lubricating my Rubik’s Cube!
Hopkins High School
Overheard by Momo.
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Teenage Guy: Hey, can I have an arm massage?
Teenage Girl: I am NOT giving you another arm massage.
Teenage Guy: Please?
Teenage Girl: NO.
Teenage Guy: Ankle massage?
Hopkins High School
Overheard by Julie.
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Guy: I decided I would do a little social experiment. So I went to the gas station and bought a chocolate muffin and sat down outside the door. Then this guy passed me, so I shoved the muffin in my mouth and started singing “What if God Was One of Us” with little pieces of the muffin falling out of my mouth. It was great.
Hopkins High School
Overheard by Julie.
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Dim 40-Something: Air-reb-snah.
Guy Pretending to Work: What?
Dim 40-Something: Your name backwards is Air-reb-snah.
Guy Pretending to Work: I pronounce it Eee-reb-snah, the ‘k’ is silent.
Dim 40-Something (in wonder): Wha? (silence… coming to a realization) There is no ‘k’.
Guy Pretending to Work: I know.
Hopkins Cubicle Farm
Overheard by putting up with this on a Friday afternoon.
Ditz: But there are, like, so many things you can’t do when you’re dead!

Hopkins High School
Overheard by …and why did you enroll in an AP class?
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Old lady #1: Did you get your hearing back?
Old lady #2: Huh?
Old lady #1: DID YOU GET YOUR HEARING BACK?
Old lady #2 then just walks away

Hopkins senior center
Overheard by overheard perfection.
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Guy: Isn’t the ultimate goal of all nations to spread their empires throughout the world?
Everyone else: No!
Guy (darkly): Well it should be.

Hopkins High School
Overheard by imperialist.
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Studious Young Man: Yo, man, where the hos at?

Hopkins High School
Overheard by apparently not a ho.
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Barely in puberty himself: Last year, she was flat. She was FLATTER than flat! She was so flat… that she was flat!

Hopkins High School
Overheard by she was concave?
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