Boyfriend: So, do you think anybody ever actually threw out the baby with the bath water?
Girlfriend: Yup.
Boyfriend: Really? I mean, how could you throw out a baby with bath water?
Girlfriend: I don’t know. Maybe by accident. You know, back in the old days people gave baths to all their kids using the same water. They didn’t throw out the water between baths, and the baby was last. That’s where the expression comes from, y’know.
Boyfriend: But you seriously think that someone threw out a baby with the bath water? I don’t.
Girlfriend: You don’t think that through the entire history of mankind no one — not one person — threw out the baby with bathwater? Even accidentally?
Boyfriend: Hmmm… I don’t know. How much do you think those tubs weighed, anyway. I mean, they had to be pretty heavy, right?
Girlfriend: I suppose, but it had to happen. How else would they come up with the expression?
Boyfriend: Well, you know the expression ‘Happy as a two-tailed dog?” Well, you don’t need to see a two-tailed dog in order to come up with the expression.
Girlfriend: Well, I’m just saying. Things were different back then. We don’t take baths like that anymore.

Light rail heading south, near Lake Street station.
Overheard by J-boy.

Likely mentally-challenged, heavily-bearded man: If I can do time in Stillwater, I can do time in a lightrail.

LRT, northbound, near DTE station
Overheard by The Freets.

After long stretch of silence, woman to man: I won’t make you go to therapy if you let me get a kitty.

Nicollet light rail station
Overheard by Oo, I want a kitty.

Girl on train #1: I brought $500 with me but when I exchanged it I only got 250. I figured it had to last me since they took half my money. But then I found out it cost 40 pence to pee.
Girl on train #2: No way!
Girl on train #1: The thing is, what you’ve gotta understand about this place is that a pair of shoes cost like 160 pounds.
Girl on train #2: So that’s like $160?
Girl on train #1: Yeah, wait. No. It’s divided in half.
Girl on train #2: Oh, so they cost $80. That’s nuts!

Lightrail
Overheard by Sophie Z.

Sorority girl #1: Ohmigod, I am sooo excited for Cancun… except, remember when we went last year and stayed at that really shady motel?
Sorority girl #2: Yeah, that was such a creepy place. Like when that guy was dragging that black smelly garbage bag down the hall leaving a trail of blood. I wonder what was in the bag…

On the lightrail heading to the airport
Overheard by What was in that bag?

Leather jacket guy: My little finger on my foot, the skin is just about falling off, what do you call that?
Baseball cap guy: Your toe?

Northbound Light Rail
Overheard by Head, shoulders, knees, and fingers?

Twenty something hipster kid talking loudly on his cell phone: “Uhhh, yeah man… you kidding me? I fuckin’ love cartoons man. Alright, you might be a little young to remember this, but remember Captain Planet? Dude thats my favorite, where he goes around saving the world from corporate America and shit! It’s a classic.

on the light rail heading downtown
Overheard by old and jaded.

Guy on cell phone: Yeah, if you want to pull it out, go ahead. Then you can stick that thing in it and see if it’s hot enough.

Light Rail train
Overheard by out of context, I hope.

Jock #1 to friend he got on the same light-rail car with: Fancy to see you here!
Jock #2: (guffaws) Where did you hear that from?
Jock #1: Oh, I Googled it.

metrodome station
Overheard by it was pretty fancy.

Little boy going downtown on the Light Rail with his father: I’m going to need a drink when we get there.

50th St. Station
Overheard by Smart Kid.

Slightly Drunk 40ish year old man with family: (singing) Take me out to the ball game, Take me out with the crowd, buy me some penis (giggle) and cracker jack… (more giggling)
Wife: Your kids are going to run away if you keep singing that.

After the Twins Game, 28th Avenue Lightrail Station
Overheard by Thinks his kids should run away.

Twenty-something girl talking loudly into her cell phone: So they said it’s not ringworm — it’s some kind of skin virus that LOOKS like ringworm. And they said I’m really lucky because so far it’s only on my back and stomach, not, like, my whole body and face. The tests come back on Friday, but they said it’s probably really contagious. I just hope it goes away before my trip to Miami!

Hiawatha Light Rail Line
Overheard by sooooo glad I didn’t sit next to her.

Sheltered suburban child who clearly had never been downtown before: Hey, lookit! A poor man playing the guitar! I wonder how he got the guitar? …if he’s poor.

on the light rail in front of the Metrodome

Frat guy: Dude, this ticket expires at 23:49, ha ha I don’t even know what time that is!
Sororitard: I know, me either! 23:49? What the hell does that mean?

LR Downtown/East Metrodome station
Overheard by LR Downtown/East Metrodome station.

Girl: She got so much money. I just don’t know where she gets it all. She wants her some kids so bad! You know that lil’ mama’s got everything in her house for a baby but the crib.
Dude #1: For real?
Girl: Yeah, you know she’s got everything for a baby but the crib. And the stroller. The stroller and the crib.
Dude #2: …and some man.

LR, Downtown East/Metrodome Station
Overheard by think before you procreate, please.

Young businessman from out-of-town: I’d name my kid “Pajamas”, ’cause then you could call him “PJ”, and that wouldn’t be so bad.

Light rail from the airport

‘Classy’ Pre-Teen On Cell: Is he in prison or jail? ’cause them’s two different thangs. Oh… he’s in Juvey? DAAAAAMNNNNNNN!!!!!

Light Rail
Overheard by Everyone on the train.

Girl #1: What’s it mean when your underwear smells like coffee?
Girl #2: It means you should go to the doctor.

light rail
Overheard by Danielle.

College student home from out of town, to the boyfriend who was sucking on her neck the entire time: The girl next to me on the plane was, like, a Born-Again Christian, but she was, like, really sweet - like, REALLY sweet, and she was, like, really, like interested, like, in what I was, like, studying.

On the train at the 46th Street Station
Overheard by PTW.

Girl on phone: Yeah, I just left the courthouse. Well, the lawyer told him to just move up to Minnesota and start a new life. It seems to me he’s been on the run for… 8 months or so. The lawyer said he can’t have been trying too hard to turn himself in. Yeah, his bail was just for $7500 or so. There were two other guys there who were indicted, and their bail was for $1 million. I heard that and I was like, DAMN!

Light Rail / Warehouse District Stop