Ditz: They should just make cars out of like, cushions.  Then they’d just bounce.  Why don’t they make them like that?
Guy: (long pause) It might be aerodynamics.

Pizza Luce, Uptown
Overheard by the sex ain’t worth it, buddy.

Man in his late 40s: UNPROTECTED SEX!

Pizza Luce on Selby Avenue
Overheard by giggling teenagers.

Disgruntled customer: So, is there, like any way I can get this pizza for free or for a discount?
Pizza Luce guy: So, you basically want to not pay for this?
Disgruntled customer: Yeah, pretty much.
Pizza Luce guy: No, we can’t logically do that.

Pizza Luce, Uptown
Overheard by It does hurt to ask.

Smarmy Business Guy: Whats the worst thing I could have done for my relationship with Jane*?
Colleague: You told her she was fat?
Smarmy Business Guy: No, worse.
Colleague: Well, the worst thing you could have done is cheat on her!
Smarmy Business Guy: No, worse!!
Colleague: What’s worse than that?!
Smarmy Business Guy: I told her I loved her.

Pizza Luce - Downtown
Overheard by McLovin.

Young Hipster Bartender: Hey do you know how to post pictures on MySpace?
Hipster Off Duty Server: Yeah.
Young Hipster Bartender: I mean like on other people’s pages in the comments.
Hipster Off Duty Server: Will you stop talking to me about Myspace in public?!? It’s embarrasing.

Pizza Luce on Franklin
Overheard by I’m not the only crazy one.

Prim girl in flower print dress to prim girl in yellow sundress: Watch out for the dude in the tattoos.
Prim girl in yellow sundress: Ya, no doubt. Wait, which guy in the tattoos?
Prim girl in flower print dress: The one who keeps saying he is a Uptown Legend.

beer line at Pizza Luce Block Party
Overheard by Taco.

Drunk Guy to Drunk Gir walking arm-in-waist: If I put my hand down your pants right now, would that offend you?

Pizza Luce Block Party, 10:10pm
Overheard by The Mad Ripple.