Chipper cashier: Oh, I like cats. Do you have a kitty?
Crusty old man with large bag of cat food: Yeah. 39 of them.

Maple Grove, Super Target
Overheard by No matter how hard Maple Grove tries to be Edina or Eden Prairie…

Five-year-old girl to Mom: Is Valentine’s Day when the Easter Bunny comes?

Maple Grove, Target Valentine’s Section
Overheard by Dreaded girl.

Blonde Girl, about upcoming holidays: I’m not going to not eat the things I like, I’m just going to throw up.

Maple Grove, Noodles & Company
Overheard by Stunned.

Customer, having just purchased a small item: I don’t need a bag, I can just stick this in my purse. Save a bag. (laughs)
Cashier: You can now sleep better knowing you’ve done such a great thing!
Customer: No, the red wine will do that for me.

Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by I want wine…

Teenage girl #1, complaining to her friend about her sore legs: Seriously, I feel like my body is rising up against me or something.
Teenage girl #2: I thought that only happened with guys.
(awkward silence)
Teenage girl #1: Did you seriously just say that?

Maple Grove, Arbor Lakes
Overheard by: Yes. Yes she did.

Semi-drunk fellow: Yeah! And that stupid chick tried to tell me that Leeann Chin was her aunt!
Semi-drunk friend: Well, you believed her, didn’t you?
Semi-drunk fellow: NO! I pretended to so I’d get some.  I mean, she isn’t even Asian!

Maple Grove, house party
Overheard by Leeann’s chin.

20-something girl to friends: You know what I discovered the other day? I hate monkeys! I was watching “30 Rock” and they had a pet monkey on there and I was just like, “Oh my gosh, I HATE him!”

Maple Grove, church parking lot
Overheard by And I always thought monkeys were funny.

Mom to her 2 yr old son: Eating a piece of railroad and carrying a dog by its tail. You know how to live. Good times.

Maple Grove, Little Feet Childrens Shoes
Overheard by This isn’t surprising when you work here…

Elementary aged know-it-all girl: You know, I’d have voted for McCain if it weren’t for Sarah Palin. She was his biggest downfall.
Elementary smart-ass boy: Kaylee, you’re not old enough to vote. Get over it.

Maple Grove, Maple Grove High School
Overheard by From the Mouths of Babes.

Young girl in pigtails: I’m a democrat like my mom. Franken is amazing, and I know he is going to win.
Young boy with mullet: Dude, none of us are democrat. We all like Coleman.
Young girl in pigtails: But Coleman is a Jew!
Young boy: Shut up, so is Franken.
Young girl in pigtails: Then, why does any of it matter?

Maple Grove, Maple Grove High School
Overheard by Concerned Voter.

Adult woman #1:  Where was it made?
Adult woman #2:  Vietnam.
Adult woman #1:  Those Vietnamese children don’t take any pride in their work.

Maple Grove, JC Penney’s
Overheard by Just Looking.

Guy #1, walking into Wal-mart: Do you smell that?
Guy #2: Smell what?
Guy #1: The smell of poverty.

Maple Grove, Wal-mart
Overheard by the Scent of Savings

Middle aged woman, inspecting a new 10 dollar bill: We the people. Yeah, WE the people are living an Obamanation. Oh, did I just say that out loud? (walks away)

Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by I’m thinking she voted for McCain.

50 yr old meathead I share a cubicle with (on the phone): I was so wasted, and was driving this girl home from the bar and we almost got into an accident.  That would be bad. (pause) Not only would we both get injured, but I would for sure get a DUI!

Maple Grove, my cubicle
Overheard by annoyed co-worker.

Girlfriend to her boyfriend: Oh, and by the way my brother just told me to remind you that he has his shotgun in the house.
Friend to Boyfriend: Doesn’t that worry you that her brother feels the need to remind you he has a gun?
Boyfriend: Not really, she has her own!

Maple Grove, Bonfire
Overheard by well thats good to know.

Woman to daughter: You know, I’m just about ready to get an Obama sign to put in the yard or something!

Maple Grove, Byerly’s parking lot
Overheard by rachel.

Cashier,  holding up bottle of nail polish teenage girl has just purchased: Would you like a bag for this?
Teenage girl, smiling politely: Yes, please.
Friend standing next to her (completely serious): You don’t need to waste a plastic bag for that, don’t you care about the environment?!
Teenage girl: No, I’m a Republican! *takes bag and walks away*

Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by She knows politics better than me…

Young 20something reading a text message aloud to her friend who is at the checkout counter: “This is the equivalent to dropping a newborn baby.” (looks at friend) What do I even say to that?!

Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by my job is slowly crushing my soul.

Teen talking to friend at urinal: How many people do you think have wacked off into this urinal?

Arbor Lakes AMC
Overheard by Seriously?!

Teenage Girl #1: That would SO never happen. The ugly guy never gets the girl.
Teenage Girl #2: I KNOW. She would so be looking for a hotter guy.
Concerned Mom behind them: They’re robots. It’s a movie, and you missed the point. She loves his personality.
Teenage Girl #1: Fuck personality. I want money and a hot guy.
Guy Staring at Young Teenager: That can be arranged.

AMC Arbor Lakes 16
Overheard by Ironic…who thought that Wall E had a good message.