Posts Tagged ‘maple grove’
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Summing It Up
Cashier, holding up bottle of nail polish teenage girl has just purchased: Would you like a bag for this?
Teenage girl, smiling politely: Yes, please.
Friend standing next to her (completely serious): You don’t need to waste a plastic bag for that, don’t you care about the environment?!
Teenage girl: No, I’m a Republican! *takes bag and walks away*Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by She knows politics better than me… -
Request Reimbursement For The Text Fee
Young 20something reading a text message aloud to her friend who is at the checkout counter: “This is the equivalent to dropping a newborn baby.” (looks at friend) What do I even say to that?!
Maple Grove, Ulta
Overheard by my job is slowly crushing my soul. -
Just You, Little Buddy
Teen talking to friend at urinal: How many people do you think have wacked off into this urinal?
Arbor Lakes AMC
Overheard by Seriously?! -
It Takes Someone Special To Sexualize A Robot
Teenage Girl #1: That would SO never happen. The ugly guy never gets the girl.
Teenage Girl #2: I KNOW. She would so be looking for a hotter guy.
Concerned Mom behind them: They’re robots. It’s a movie, and you missed the point. She loves his personality.
Teenage Girl #1: Fuck personality. I want money and a hot guy.
Guy Staring at Young Teenager: That can be arranged.AMC Arbor Lakes 16
Overheard by Ironic…who thought that Wall E had a good message. -
Now I’m Going To Have To Stop Doing That
Teenage girl #1: Anthropologie has such cute clothes.
Teenage girl #2: (enthusiastically) I know. Sometimes I just want to lick the tags!Arbor Lakes Anthropologie
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Maybe In 4-5 Years
Matronly cube neighbor: A lot of boys don’t get braces. Tell your son from me, the guys who get braces are hunks.
694 and 94, Maple Grove
Overheard by Hunks? -
Clearly
Man: Did you throw away those Little Smokies?
Pregnant Woman #1: There was only one weenie left.
Pregnant Woman #2: (with a twinkle in her eye) That’s all you need.
Superbowl Party – Maple Grove
Overheard by your mom. -
Hey-Ooooh!
Sixteen year-old boy to friend:: Well, if you need me I’ll be in the bathroom for the next 58 minutes.
borders in maple grove
Overheard by at least there’s plenty of reading material? -
Um, You’re Doing It Wrong
20-something guy on cell phone: No, I’m just sitting here waiting with a vibrator in my hand.
granite city lobby, maple grove
Overheard by earmuffs. -
There Went Our Last Hope.
A 3 year old to his father: Daddy, I’ve been waiting for Guitar Hero for the Wii since when I was in Mommy’s belly.
Maple Grove Best Buy
Overheard by someone who likes the kid’s style. -
There’s Still Time To Change The Will!
Middle-aged man, who came in running and panting, interrupting a sale in progress: My parents are going into a nursing home and I need to pick up the cheapest mattress you have.
Mattress store employee: Okay, that–
Middle-aged man: I don’t expect them to live longer than a year.
Mattress store employee: Okay, that would be our Regency Plus mattress set for $149.
Middle-aged man: Regency Plus? That doesn’t sound very cheap… I get everything for $149? Do you sell anything smaller that I could, say, carry their body on and fit into the coffin?
Original Mattress Factory, Maple Grove
Overheard by Kedster. -
Talk To You Later, Grandma.
Tall Metrosexual Dude: I’m hanging up. I love myself too much to be a part of this conversation any more.
Panera Bread in Maple Grove
Overheard by Ironic, who wonders why love is the problem. -
They Can’t Help It, Nobody Else Lives Out There.
Older Woman to table of friends: Sisters marrying brothers. Brothers marrying sisters. Just like in North Dakota.
Original Pancake House, Maple Grove
Overheard by North is the new South? -
Dude, Get A PS3.
Man REALLY enjoying hosing off a car: Man, if it were summer all the time in Minnesota, I wouldn’t need Nintendo, I’d just need a hose.
Maple Grove cul de sac
Overheard by guess he’s a cheap date. -
From The Land Of The Nonsensical.
Blonde college girl: Who doesn’t have a middle name?
Brown haired college girl: Slaves!
Blonde college girl: What?
Brown haired college girl: Think about it.
Maple Grove
Overheard by still thinking… -
It’s Not Good For Daddy’s Hangover.
Frustrated dad to silly little daughter: Will you please pretend to cry a little quieter.
DSW/Maple Grove
Overheard by Jason. -
Only If The Noodles Were Wet.
Female Friend #1: (jokingly) You better watch out or I’m gonna get you back!
Female Friend #2: Oh really how?
Female Friend #1: I shall attack with noodles!
Female Friend #2: I can’t say that I’d be very afraid of that.
Female Friend #1: It will be like Chinese water torture!
Female Friend #2: Water can hurt! Like at a high velocity, just think of those water jets that cut metal and stuff.
Female Friend #1: Noodles would hurt at high velocity too!
Crux of 494 and 94 – Maple Grove
Overheard by weirdo. -
The Babysitter Everyone Dreams Of.
Not-so-skinny-herself: So I’m babysitting and they have this weird goat’s milk or something in the fridge. I freaked out because I couldn’t tell which was the weird milk and which was the breast milk for the baby.
Friend: Goat’s milk?
Not-so-skinny-herself: Yeah. They’re some kind of weird vegetarians. Not very good ones, though, because the mom is totally fat.
Yarn Cafe, Maple Grove
Overheard by Caffeine Queen. -
No, That’s “Death.”
Girl: (pointing to an outdoor garden area) Hey, can we go look at the flowers?
Guy: I don’t want to buy any flowers. Flowers are God’s way of saying, “Hey, things die.”
Cub Maple Grove
Overheard by ThisGuyWithTwoEars.
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