Posts Tagged ‘moms’
Kid: Mom, do we have to be good in here?
Mom, trying to hurry: Yes. We always have to be good in the library.
Mom: Because good things happen to good people.
Mom, getting frustrated: Because that’s the way things work, honey.
Kid: Is there a God?
Mom, at wit’s end: I sure hope so!
St Paul, Merriam Park Library
Mom to little kid: This is not the place to have fun.
Minneapolis, exit ramp from Target Field after the 11-1 win against Cleveland
Overheard by Happy Twins Fan.
Mother walking into DSW with young son: Now behave! This isn’t a Chuck E. Cheese!
Mall of America
Overheard by amused employee.
Mom, to child: God saw you giving me a hard time. [pause] And Santa, too.
St Paul, Near Macalester
Overheard by Now we know who is really in charge.
Professor/mom, about her young son: Kids rebel, you know. I’m afraid he’s going to be a Republican when he’s a teenager.
Minneapolis, U of M
Overheard by cl.
Mom: Diego, take your little brother to the bathroom. (they start to walk away) And bring him BACK, too!
Minneapolis, Lake Street Target
Overheard by Specificity is Greatly Appreciated.
Middle aged woman playing Bar-Bingo: It’s hard to bite your baby!
Brooklyn Park, VFW
Overheard by Aaron.
Woman, to her toddler son: You ain’t a girl! Stop cryin’!
Minneapolis, Hennepin County Human Services
Overheard by Somebody’s never seen “Free to Be You and Me.”
Mom to friends: With a kind heart, in a nonjudgemental fashion I passionately told Jane’s mom how ill behaved her child was.
Overheard by biting my tongue.
Little boy to mother in stall: Mom, what’s taking so long? Are ya poopin?
Mom: I’m still in here. I’ll be out in a second.
Boy: But are ya poopin?
Mom: I’ll be out in a second.
Boy: Yeah, but are ya poopin?
Minneapolis, Women’s restroom at Orchestra Hall
Overheard by someone just trying to wash their hands.
4-year-old boy sitting in cart putting on sunglasses: Mom, do these make me look bad ass?
Startled mother looking at pens: We don’t talk about that. Wait, where did you get that from??
Boy: Batman. Do these look bad ass?
Coon Rapids, Pen asile at Officemax
Overheard by Officemax Employee.
Girl holding long piece of paper: Will you hold this for me, Mommy?
Mom, with armful of books: Look how much I am carrying, and what you have. Do you think it’s fair to ask me? Are you the Queen of Sheba?
Eden Prairie, library parking lot
Overheard by a patron.
Mother: Wait, how would you know what Magic Hat is?
Son: Why wouldn’t I?
Mother: It’s beer! You’re TWELVE.
Overheard by Atta boy.
Mom to 5-year-old son about his baby teethers: Stop putting those things all over your arms; you’re freaking people out.
Son: You’re freaking ME out!
Mom: We won’t be able to shop here again unless we bring these ladies some booze.
Maple Grove, Little Feet Children’s Shoes
Overheard by worker who would gladly accept that offer.
Five-year-old girl sitting directly behind her mom: Mommy. Mommy! Mommy!!!
Mom: Honey, I can’t turn my head 180 degrees. I’m not an owl.
Five-year-old girl: Mommy, knock knock.
Mom: Who’s there?
Five-year-old girl: Who.
Mom: Who who?
Five-year-old girl: I thought you said you weren’t an owl?
Mound, Hockey Arena
Overheard by You kiss your mother with that mouth?
Mother, to her young teenage daughter in the shower area: Do you want to use some of this orange-flavored soap to wash your bum?
St. Paul, YWCA locker room
Overheard by someone who has never tasted orange-flavored soap.
Cute little boy: NICE STICK!!!!!!
His mom: Shhhh, you can’t say that!
St. Paul, Swarm game at Xcel
Overheard by get your mind out of the gutter.
Mom to 7 year-old kid: No, sweetie, that’s a grown-up tooth. And when you lose grown-up teeth, you have to pay the tooth fairy to bring you a new one.
St. Paul, Highland Chatterbox
Overheard by Next booth over.
Mom to small child: Now, you didn’t drink any water in the swamp, did you?
Forest Lake, Norman Quack’s Restaurant
Overheard by Better get the Ipecac.
Mom, to her kid: What do you want to eat?
Little kid: BUFFALO!
Mom: You mean buffet?
Little kid: NO. A BUFFALO!
Minneapolis, Franklin & Nicollet Bus Stop
Overheard by Malarchy.