Posts Tagged ‘northeast’
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You Might Be From Minnesota If…
30 something suburban woman #1: So what do I do with him???
30 something suburban woman #2: Take him home and sleep with him!
30 something suburban woman #1: What do I do after that???
30 something suburban woman #2: Make him lefsa.Mayslack’s
Overheard by norwego. -
Is It Me Or Did It Just Get Exciting In Here?
Guy #1: I’m sorry dude, I never replaced your Inca sacrificial onyx knife that I broke.
Guy #2: Mayan, actually. That’s OK, though.Jax Supper Club, NE Mnpls
Overheard by Stu Dog. -
Sorry, Does Not Compute
Hungry Angry Teenage Boy to his Mom: Just cuz it says Tuna Helper doesn’t mean ya gotta add tuna!
From the sh–t, kickin’, speed takin’, truck-drivin’ neighbors downstairs . . .(in ne mpls)
Overheard by Wishing my FICO score was better, so I could buy a house in a better neighborhood. -
Nobody Knows What You Mean
Guy on cellphone: But goddamn Ponce de Leon. You know what I mean?
Outside 331 club
Overheard by swift passerby. -
But Every Other Time? Yeah
Girl #1: Does my ass look okay in this?
Girl #2: Yes.
Girl #1: Would you lie to me?
(pause)
Girl #2: Yes, but I’m not lying right now.
Target- nordeast
Overheard by well at least that’s honest -
Let’s Find A Way To Bring Them Together.
Guy to girlfriend/wife: You like shopping and I like blood…
Bulldog NE -
It’s Just That Easy.
Young Hipster: What do you recommend?
Bartender: (names off some fairly obscure beers…)
Young Hipster: Do you have anything that tastes kind of like PBR?
Bartender: Why don’t you just have a PBR?
Young Hipster: OK.
331 Club
Overheard by Alie. -
Hipster Introspection.
Late 20s guy with man purse: Sure, I own a white belt, but I wear it as a joke. And I don’t own a
trucker hat.
Overheard at NE Bulldog
Overheard by Ed. -
We Know. We Can Smell It.
Handlebar-Mustached Prick: I got up two hours early today so I could wax my my mustache before work.
331 Club -
And Your Face.
Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I don’t like French New Wave films.
Bearded man: Why’s that?
Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I just don’t like them.
Bearded man: I understand that, but can you give me a reason as to why you don’t like them?
Pretentious Radio K douchbag wearing velvet jacket: I don’t need to give you a reason, I just know that I don’t like them. Like how I know I don’t like your beard, or the beer you’re drinking.
Bearded man: Oh, well I guess the velvet jacket solidifies your point.
331 Club/NE MPLS
Overheard by Antoine Doinel. -
But Do They Have Bears? (Crickets…)
Girl: Fifteen Dollars?!? Why would I pay fifteen when I can go to Como Zoo for free?
Guy: Because they don’t have lions and tigers at the Como Zoo.
Girl: So what?
Guy: Yeah, you’ve got a point. Want another drink?
Grumpy’s Northeast patio
Overheard by An Amused Veteranarian. -
Well, You Gave It Your All.
Young African American girl playing tennis: I’m gonna be like Serena Williams! (commence playing for 1 minute) I’m so done with this.
NE Tennis Court
Overheard by Serena Probably Wouldn’t Have Gotten that Far with That Attitude. -
It’s A Bad Day For The French Language.
Guy: What does “laissez faire” mean?
Girl: It means “hands-off.”
Guy: Great, then these are laissez faire beers! My hands are off! Let the French pay for them, with their stupid fucking words.
331
Overheard by the wee monsieur. -
Do You Have Any Pets?
Zombies: BRAINS!!!
Litte old lady gardening: Oh, sorry I’m fresh out! I gave it all to the last horde.
NE Mpls – Zombie Pub Crawl
Overheard by a zombie left unfufilled. -
It’s A Different World.
Zombie #1 to Zombie #2: I recognize you from somewhere. Craigslist?
331 – Zombie Pub Crawl
Overheard by Aaron.
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