Posts Tagged ‘parks’
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Jealous?
Older woman: Now that the fireworks have started, they’re probably having crazy sex in the port-a-potties!!
Bloomington Summer Fete
Overheard by pocavontas. -
That Is Awful
Shirtless guy #1: So, what I hate is when you wake up and you’re, like, still drunk.
(Rest of shirtless dudes chuckle)
Shirtless guy #2: No, what I really hate is, you know, when you wake up after getting trashed and there’s someone in your bed.New Brighton Park
Overheard by just wanted to go for a walk… -
Better Wait A Few Years Or You’ll Just Get His Kneecaps
5 year old little boy to grandmother: If I ever meet George Bush, I’m going to kick him in the balls.
Walk to the Pershing park
Overheard by Trying not to laugh parent. -
Look Again
Girl(near some geese): Look! It’s a turkey.
Wolfe Park
Overheard by From a bench nearby. -
I Can’t Compete With The Pure Wit
Man whose male dog is being humped by another male dog: Hey! Knock that off! What?! What kind of dog park IS this?! *pause* I thought I was in Uptown for a second.
Egan Dog Park in Plymouth
Overheard by I think his dog liked it. -
Imagine The Carnage If You Toss In A Hiccup
Young gent to little gal: If you fart and burp at the same time, you’ll explode.
warming house at matthews park in Seward -
They’re Not A Pizza Topping
Man #1: So, do you like small nipples or large ones?
Man #2: Depends…
Lake Calhoun southside
Overheard by tina. -
I Don’t Know What Those Are But They Sound Beautiful
Woman stopping to light a cigarette while admiring the falls: You guys, it looks like one of those moving pictures you can get at, like, those mall kiosks.
Rest of group, also lighting their cigs, in unison: Yeeaaaaah!
Gooseberry Falls State Park
Overheard by Ahhhh, nature. -
Dreams – 1, Cynicism – 0
20-something male, who just slammed alcoholic energy drink and crushed it on the pavement: Finished!
20-something female: Wow, you’re the winner of drinking under bridges.
Under Bridge by Lake Calhoun
Overheard by does that make me the loser. -
And If You’re Naughty, Santa Pierces Your Nose
5 year old boy looking devastated at 20 something’s tongue ring while drinking his 3rd root beer: Where did you get that?
20 something guy: That’s what happens when you have too much sugar; the dentist pierces your tongue.
family gathering in uptown park
Overheard by satisfied passerby. -
Yeah, Great.
6-7 year old boy riding a bike ahead of his father: Dad, am I winning the race?
Middle aged father: Well, bud, you are winning the race of life.
lake harriet
Overheard by I wonder if I can find his motivational book on Amazon. -
Women Love This Shit.
80-year-old man, waving hands in the air: Wow, all these pretty girls running by could get an 80-year-old man excited.
Pheasant Woods Park
Overheard by pretty girl running by. -
Masters Of Insults.
Kid #1: You’re too scared to go in the water!
Kid #2: You’re a Christian! You’re a scaredy-cat!
Kid #1: You a Moos-za-lim! Moos-za-lim.
Kid #2: You’re so scared! Scaredy-cat!
Lake Nokomis
Overheard by girl in scrubs. -
Normal People Just Blame Their Children For Slowing Them Down.
Middle Aged Man walking dog: Come on, Queenie. Everyone’s passing us and it’s because of you.
Lake Calhoun, 6:30 am
Overheard by I think it’s because I’m running and you’re walking. -
If I Had A Nickel For Every Time I Made That Mistake…
Man #1 looking at pictures: You had a bike with you in the boundary waters?
Man #2 showing pictures: No, that’s a canoe.
Man #1: Really? It kind of looked like a bike for a second.
Hidden Beach -
Canoeing Is Hard.
Twenty-something woman to friend while carrying kayaks: See, it’s just like a canoe, except you have to paddle on both sides.
Lake Calhoun
Overheard by Unless you like going in circles, I suppose. -
Bring The 3 Person Slingshot, Too.
20-something girl on cell phone: Hey yea! Come to the beach and we’ll set you on fire!
hidden beach-uptown
Overheard by don’t think the cops will approve. -
Man: 0, Port-A-Potty: 1.
Man–apparently serious–calling loudly to nearby friend from inside portable toilet: I can’t figure out how to flush this thing.
Lake Hiawatha -
…Again?
Lifeguard, caring a shovel from Lake Nokomis: Well, no one will ever be able to find that again.
Lake Nokomis beach
Overheard by Still Playing Scrabble on the beach. -
They Come Waterproof Now?!
Twelve year old girl #1: Oh man, the sunscreen opened up in my bag. I’m going to sue Banana Boat. It got on my gum and my lip gloss.
Twelve year old girl #2: Yeah, but at least the Old Maid cards are waterproof.
Lake Nokomis beach
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