College girl: What’s in a gyro?
College boy: Lamb’s meat.
College girl: Lamb’s meat. Is that like pork chops?

House party Dinkytown
Overheard by t.ro.

College girl: Is a hernia where your intestines come out of your poophole?

House party Dinkytown

Man #1, huddled under a tent during storm: Should we go stand under the 394 bridge instead? (points to mass of people under the bridge)
Man #2: It’s sort of a toss up. Either stand under a tent in a tornado or stand under a Minnesota bridge.
Man #1: Good point. Let’s stay here.

Basilica Block Party
Overheard by Why won’t they serve beer during the rainstorm?

50-something Man With Arms Raised Drunkenly Scream-Slurring to Friends: I’M GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH MY WIFE TONIGHT!

Basilica Block Party
Overheard by Glad I’m Not His Wife…

Old Guy #1: Dude, wanna smoke some killer pot?
Old Guy #2: Fuck yeah, you got any?

At a BBQ attended by mostly twenty somethings at noon in Saint Paul
Overheard by atendee of BBQ.

Girl, as two rambunctious gay guys run by: Is it like this every weekend?

Near Loring Park
Overheard by In a perfect world…

Cutie queen: I’m not being judgmental but, hello, the 80s called and they want their recreational drug back.

Uptown Pride Block Party
Overheard by Alexis.

White boy on crutches, loudly to sassy Latina girl: Is it because I am white?!

House party on the west side of St Paul
Overheard by whitegirl.

Senior Boy: I HAVE NO CAPACITY FOR PORN!

Wayzata High School Senior Party
Overheard by I doubt that…

Drunk girl at a party: I want to be a lawyer because I think three people should be able to marry each other!

A party on the U campus
Overheard by I want to shoot you.

Abnormally skinny girl: I feel fat.
Normal girl: Shut up before I smother you with my muffin top.

Party in Seward

Man: Did you throw away those Little Smokies?
Pregnant Woman #1: There was only one weenie left.
Pregnant Woman #2: (with a twinkle in her eye) That’s all you need.

Superbowl Party - Maple Grove
Overheard by your mom.

Trendy, white, barely 20 something adding to conversation on pregnancy and adoption after too many glasses of wine: Yeah, you know I’ve always wanted to adopt a black baby so that I can dress him up in Adidas track suits!
Other 20 something white woman: Well, I want to adopt a black baby, too, but I had not considered the fashion possibilities.

Downtown St.Paul
Overheard by Glad I’m not a black baby up for adoption.

Middle-Aged Neighbor #1: I love Lynyrd Skynyrd.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #2: Yeah, great music. (Long Pause) It’s too bad he died in that plane crash.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #1: You mean that they died in a plane crash. it was a band, not a single person.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #2: You’re shittin’ me?

Lakeville neighborhood block party

Female party goer: Damn, there’s, like, all walks of life at this party.
Male party goer #1: I can honestly say this looks, feels and smells like controlled danger.
Male party goer #2: Well, I did see a gang upstairs.

keg house party/5th ave and 82nd Bloomington,Mn.

Used to be skinny, senior girl: Ugh, I just hate all these freshmen who think they have such hot vaginas.

Carleton Party
Overheard by hot freshman.

Female in bathroom at New Years party after a lot of noise and breaking glass: Ok, that happened for two reasons. One: there are too many people in the bathroom. And two: having only two bamboo shoots in a glass vase is just not feng shui.

Grand & 29th
Overheard by Why wasn’t I invited?

Girl walking into living room, ball is being dropped; clock says 11:59:22: What? There’s 11 more minutes left?!

cottage grove new year’s party
Overheard by so glad the public school system worked for me.

High School Guy: I have so much pent-up emotion!

18th Birthday Party in Burnsville
Overheard by Just Let it Out, Man.

Drunk guy: I was in a treatment facility once.
Not drunk guy: Should you be drinking now?
Drunk guy: Oh, booze wasn’t my problem. I’m from Iowa.
Not drunk guy: Meth, then?
Drunk guy: How’d you know?

uptown house party
Overheard by just a hunch.