16th July 2008

We’ll Give You A Minute

College girl: What’s in a gyro?
College boy: Lamb’s meat.
College girl: Lamb’s meat. Is that like pork chops?

House party Dinkytown
Overheard by t.ro.

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16th July 2008

That’s Called Death

College girl: Is a hernia where your intestines come out of your poophole?

House party Dinkytown

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14th July 2008

Anyone Want To Work Out Those Odds?

Man #1, huddled under a tent during storm: Should we go stand under the 394 bridge instead? (points to mass of people under the bridge)
Man #2: It’s sort of a toss up. Either stand under a tent in a tornado or stand under a Minnesota bridge.
Man #1: Good point. Let’s stay here.

Basilica Block Party
Overheard by Why won’t they serve beer during the rainstorm?

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14th July 2008

Better Give Her A Head Start

50-something Man With Arms Raised Drunkenly Scream-Slurring to Friends: I’M GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH MY WIFE TONIGHT!

Basilica Block Party
Overheard by Glad I’m Not His Wife…

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6th July 2008

No, That’s Why I Asked

Old Guy #1: Dude, wanna smoke some killer pot?
Old Guy #2: Fuck yeah, you got any?

At a BBQ attended by mostly twenty somethings at noon in Saint Paul
Overheard by atendee of BBQ.

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29th June 2008

It Should Be

Girl, as two rambunctious gay guys run by: Is it like this every weekend?

Near Loring Park
Overheard by In a perfect world…

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29th June 2008

Time To Upgrade

Cutie queen: I’m not being judgmental but, hello, the 80s called and they want their recreational drug back.

Uptown Pride Block Party
Overheard by Alexis.

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11th June 2008

Okay, We’ll Go With That

White boy on crutches, loudly to sassy Latina girl: Is it because I am white?!

House party on the west side of St Paul

Overheard by whitegirl.

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9th June 2008

Your Hard Drive Is Only So Big

Senior Boy: I HAVE NO CAPACITY FOR PORN!

Wayzata High School Senior Party
Overheard by I doubt that…

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2nd June 2008

Sounds Good So Far

Drunk girl at a party: I want to be a lawyer because I think three people should be able to marry each other!

A party on the U campus
Overheard by I want to shoot you.

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5th May 2008

What A Way To Go!

Abnormally skinny girl: I feel fat.
Normal girl: Shut up before I smother you with my muffin top.

Party in Seward

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4th February 2008

Clearly

Man: Did you throw away those Little Smokies?
Pregnant Woman #1: There was only one weenie left.
Pregnant Woman #2: (with a twinkle in her eye) That’s all you need.

Superbowl Party - Maple Grove
Overheard by your mom.

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30th January 2008

We Were Starting To Make Some Progress, Too…

Trendy, white, barely 20 something adding to conversation on pregnancy and adoption after too many glasses of wine: Yeah, you know I’ve always wanted to adopt a black baby so that I can dress him up in Adidas track suits!
Other 20 something white woman: Well, I want to adopt a black baby, too, but I had not considered the fashion possibilities.

Downtown St.Paul
Overheard by Glad I’m not a black baby up for adoption.

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13th January 2008

You Have To Try Harder To Be Cool

Middle-Aged Neighbor #1: I love Lynyrd Skynyrd.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #2: Yeah, great music. (Long Pause) It’s too bad he died in that plane crash.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #1: You mean that they died in a plane crash. it was a band, not a single person.
Middle-Aged Neighbor #2: You’re shittin’ me?

Lakeville neighborhood block party

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7th January 2008

Now It’s A Party

Female party goer: Damn, there’s, like, all walks of life at this party.
Male party goer #1: I can honestly say this looks, feels and smells like controlled danger.
Male party goer #2: Well, I did see a gang upstairs.

keg house party/5th ave and 82nd Bloomington,Mn.

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7th January 2008

Don’t Worry, They Can Find Relief In Topical Creams

Used to be skinny, senior girl: Ugh, I just hate all these freshmen who think they have such hot vaginas.

Carleton Party
Overheard by hot freshman.

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2nd January 2008

Don’t You Just Hate That?

Female in bathroom at New Years party after a lot of noise and breaking glass: Ok, that happened for two reasons. One: there are too many people in the bathroom. And two: having only two bamboo shoots in a glass vase is just not feng shui.

Grand & 29th
Overheard by Why wasn’t I invited?

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2nd January 2008

Hey, Where Did All The Champagne Go?

Girl walking into living room, ball is being dropped; clock says 11:59:22: What? There’s 11 more minutes left?!

cottage grove new year’s party
Overheard by so glad the public school system worked for me.

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26th December 2007

I’d Love To Read Some Of Your Poetry

High School Guy: I have so much pent-up emotion!

18th Birthday Party in Burnsville
Overheard by Just Let it Out, Man.

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2nd December 2007

Or Being From Iowa?

Drunk guy: I was in a treatment facility once.
Not drunk guy: Should you be drinking now?
Drunk guy: Oh, booze wasn’t my problem. I’m from Iowa.
Not drunk guy: Meth, then?
Drunk guy: How’d you know?

uptown house party
Overheard by just a hunch.

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