Stoner #1: Dude, I have to go to the clinic to do an A.D.D. assessment. I went yesterday, but I got distracted halfway through.
His roommate: Oh come on dude, you don’t have A.D.D.

Apartment in MPLS
Overheard by Did you even listen to him?

Hungry Angry Teenage Boy to his Mom: Just cuz it says Tuna Helper doesn’t mean ya gotta add tuna!

From the sh–t, kickin’, speed takin’, truck-drivin’ neighbors downstairs . . .(in ne mpls)
Overheard by Wishing my FICO score was better, so I could buy a house in a better neighborhood.

Four-Year-Old Alone in the Family Room: I have the most wonderful nipples.

Soon to be Far More Interesting Home in Mac/Groveland
Overheard by Curious Mother.

Stylish 20-something on cell phone: Honey, even if he does have a big penis, he still should have bought you flowers…

some apartment on huron blvd, minneapolis
Overheard by not that picky.

Tipsy Grandmother: Oh, so he nibbles you like a duck?

Haven rd, Minnetonka
Overheard by dubious.

Angry neighbor to someone on the phone: I DID NOT call you fat. I DO NOT think you are getting fat or are fat. I DO NOT think you are unattractive. What do you want me to say?

South Mpls Apartment Building
Overheard by I hope this fight was worth ruining my sleep.

Burly maintenance man in my apartment while I’m asleep #1: Yeah, so how about Jenny’s boobs?
Burly maintenance man in my apartment while I’m asleep #2: Jenny’s boobs? Yeah… I really miss those things.

Portland Avenue, St. Paul
Overheard by Trying to sleep through titty talk.

Girl walking into living room, ball is being dropped; clock says 11:59:22: What? There’s 11 more minutes left?!

cottage grove new year’s party
Overheard by so glad the public school system worked for me.

Misbehaving child at Christmas: I tried to behave, but I just couldn’t keep the ANGER IN!

A house in Ramsey, Minnesota
Overheard by Max.

High School Guy: I have so much pent-up emotion!

18th Birthday Party in Burnsville
Overheard by Just Let it Out, Man.

Drunk guy: I was in a treatment facility once.
Not drunk guy: Should you be drinking now?
Drunk guy: Oh, booze wasn’t my problem. I’m from Iowa.
Not drunk guy: Meth, then?
Drunk guy: How’d you know?

uptown house party
Overheard by just a hunch.

Gruftie: I can’t quite place your accent. It’s like German… with a trace of Irish?
Rivethead in question: I dun’t, uh, I dun’t…
Tall gothboi: Why are you talking with an accent, anyway? Aren’t you from Iowa?

apartment party, 33rd/Chicago
Overheard by sxoidmal.

8-year-old boy, to another 8-year-old boy: Let’s go play in traffic!

Outside my house, St. Paul
Overheard by Dylan.

Young African American Twin Boy Jumping on Backyard Trampoline #1: Shit man…
Young African American Twin Boy Jumping on Backyard Trampoline #2: Whaaaat?
Young African American Twin Boy Jumping on Backyard Trampoline #1: STOP F—IN’ STEPPIN’ ON MY DNA!!!

My parent’s backyard
Overheard by Well I guess he told YOU.

Young kids playing in neighbors yard: Can I get handcuffed to someone?

Uptown Backyard
Overheard by They sure grow up fast.

Electricians working in my room downstairs: You can look but you can’t touch! You can’t touch!

South Minneapolis house
Overheard by I sure hope they weren’t looking in my nightstand drawer!

Electrician on the phone with landlady: I’m just going to put the light fixture in tomorrow, if that’s ok. I cut the power upstairs, but then everything went dark, and I couldn’t see if I was mixing up the wires. I would hate to accidentally mix up the wires and watch the place burn down.

bathroom across the hall
Overheard by Are you sure you’re qualified for that?

Little girl to a group of her father’s coworkers at their home: I’m taking swimming lessons!
20 something woman: That’s great! Do you know doggy style?

Kenwood Home
Overheard by you mean doggy paddle?

Girl #1 is fixing her shirt and bra
Girl #2: Are you wearing two bras?
Girl #1: Yeah.
Girl #2: Why?
Girl #1: I need the support.

at a house in crystal
Overheard by girl #1 isn’t blonde.

Teen girl in response to hearing plans for the evening: Can you be more pacific about that? Not gonna go with, you gotta give me more info.

Friend’s basment
Overheard by wow, I’ve got to get out of this place.