Girl with poster board: You know I love you but I don’t want to put much time and money into this.
Friend: Oh, stickers!

Michaels, HarMar
Overheard by leave me and my pipe cleaners in peace.

Woman drinking a Frappuccino: Frappuccinos are bullshit!

Roseville Starbucks
Overheard by So you’re saying it wasn’t worth the $4?

Little guy in shopping cart: Mom, what are fish sticks made of?
Tired Momma: Fish. You know, the inside part.
Little Guy: Is the insides meat?
Tired Momma: Huh-uh.
(15 seconds elapse)
Little Guy: (GASP!) Are the insides of people meat?
Tired Mom: I guess so.
Little Guy: Okay, just don’t buy people sticks, mom. I won’t eat ‘em.

Super Target in Roseville
Overheard by Another Tired Momma.

Girl: 45 whole seconds huh?
Guy (defensively): Well, I haven’t been masturbating!

Grumpy’s in Roseville
Overheard by maybe you should.

Stoner to his friend:  Dude! Have you hot boxed your UPS truck?

Acorn Park disc golf course
Overheard by Rolling my eyes.

Stressed out woman: That sucks, I’m sorry.
Depressed friend: It’s not your fault.
Stressed out woman: That was a sympathy sorry. Like an ‘I’m sorry your grandma died’ sorry… not because I killed her, but because I’m sorry she’s dead.

Northern Brewer in Roseville
Overheard by I’m sorry because I don’t know what else to feel.

Young blonde woman looking for a book: Is that how the library organizes the books, the Dewey Decimal System?
Woman’s boyfriend: No, that’s about decimals and stuff.
Blonde woman: Oh. Then why’d I think that?
Boyfriend (laughing): I don’t know… that’s pretty funny though.

Roseville Library
Overheard by Poor Dewey…

Tall blonde girl talking loudly to middle aged coworker: I’m not wearing my glasses for the wedding. Glasses are just so tacky for weddings.

Roseville Target dressing room
Overheard by your face.

Husband, in the shoe section: That’s the thing about Converse, they’re trendy but got no sport… they got no sport.

Roseville Target
Overheard by amused.

Ghetto thug teen #1 leaving “21″: Man, that was a good movie.
Ghetto thug teen #2: Shit yo, let’s go learn us some math.
Ghetto thug teen #3: I gots-to start payin’ attention in that class.

Roseville movie theater
Overheard by wondering if they’ll apply to MIT to learn to count cards.

Drunk guy talking a little too loudly to his friend at the bar: Man, I can’t WAIT to go to your funeral!

Hoggsbreath - Roseville
Overheard by it should be a smashing good time.