Drunk, white trash guy: No, girl! That was my step-daddy! My real daddy’s a gang banger. Shiiiiiiiit, girl.

Shakopee, Trail of Terror, Hayride

Girl #1:  Did you get my message?
Girl #2:  What?
Girl #1: I just texted you from the privie!
Girl #2:  You just cost me fifteen cents.

Shakopee, Renaissance Festival
Overheard by Holding it until I get home.

Woman wearing fanny pack: I never have any leftover mashed potatoes, because I know how to cook for one.

Shakopee, MN, Renaissance Festival
Overheard by is there gravy in the fanny pack?

Renaissance garbed woman holding a frozen banana: They weren’t kidding! You could kill someone with one of these!

Shakopee, MN, Renaissance Festival
Overheard by who told you that?

Hickman talking to his girlfriend at the ValleyFair entrance: I should have kept my 9 mil in the car.

ValleyFair entrance
Overheard by ya think creeper?

Drunk black guy on his cell phone smoking in the alley: No, man, I said I ain’t ready for no 8 ball yet!  I will TELL you when I’m ready for my 8 ball!

Turtle’s in Shakopee
Overheard by just gonna go back inside now