Posts Tagged ‘shopping’
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Creepy Beyond His Years
9-year old boy to younger brother: Patience, my son.
Medford, Old Navy outlet
Overheard by Wise beyond his years. -
It’s Because Firemen Don’t Carry Guns
Small boy to his father: Daddy, Daddy! When I grow up I want to be a mercenary!
Minneapolis, Rainbow Foods
Overheard by Karatepanda. -
Thank Goodness For World Peace
Guy wearing T-mobile shirt: Apparently people are starting to fight about what atheist group is better. That’s ridiculous. Nobody fights about what religious group is better.
Minnetonka, T-mobile kiosk in Ridgedale Mall
Overheard by an atheist. -
Less VH1, More Discovery Channel
Skinny Girl #1: I’d rather be cancerous than be fat!
Skinny Girl #2: Yeah, me too. You can survive from cancer but when you’re fat, you’re fat forever!Wayzata, Lunds Grocery Store
Overheard by I disagree with you there. -
Everyone Under 15
One elderly man to an equally elderly man looking at their shoes: Is it from the Buckle? Doesn’t everybody buy shit at the Buckle?
Minnetonka, Dick’s Sporting Goods
Overheard by Yes, everyone buys shit at the Buckle. -
Dinner Time Also Works This Way
Youngish Kid: Mom! Mom! Can I get a quarter? All the other kids got one.
Mother: (annoyed scoff) Can’t you find one on the ground?Minneapolis, The Quarry Rainbow
Overheard by 50 cent toy grocery awesomeness. -
That Nice Thing Really Holds Them Back
Employee: Nice guys never finish last, but they ARE never in the top 3 either!
St. Paul, Axman Surplus
Overheard by OhTheresAClause. -
Maybe If You Only Wore Those
One of a group of friends, referring to a pair of leather overalls: You wear those to church, you’re going to burn in hell!
Minneapolis, clothing store
Overheard by The Clerk. -
How Big Are The Carcasses?
30-something guy on cell: I would rather just sit around than cut off flesh from carcasses.
St. Paul, Blockbuster
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That’s How I Feel About Weddings
Teenage Girl talking to her friend about New Years Eve plans: I don’t want to get dressed-dressed up because I’m just going to get drunk anyway.
Roseville, Rosedale Center, Macy’s junior department
Overheard by stay classy. -
It’s Way Too Early To Wimp Out Now
Girl getting out of her car in the parking lot: Oh my God!!! I miss LA!
Minnetonka, Ridgedale
Overheard by Stephan. -
That’s A Whole Different Kind Of Christmas Miracle
Guy #1: I swear it’s here. (grabs snowglobe with a nativity scene) It is! It’s the one with two babies in it!
Guy #2: Does that one have two babies in it? (looks carefully)
Guy#1: It does! (tucks it under his arm and takes it to the counter)Minneapolis, Macy’s Christmas Store
Overheard by Santa. -
Obviously
Woman looking at galoshes, to daughter: Your father has rubbers, but I can never get him to wear them.
Minneapolis, Xmas shopping
Overheard by Andrea. -
It’s The Only Reason I Work There
Loud (maybe drunk) lady: I take the water in my Orange Julius and replace it with vodka.
Blaine, Cub parking lot
Overheard by supertoyz. -
You Can Never Be Too Careful
20-something guy: So, we can stay in the really long line or stand in the line with hippies.
20-somthing girl, looks over: We’re staying here.Minneapolis, Rainbow Foods
Overheard by I’m with you. -
And I’m Really Slow At It
Dad to 6 year old son: I got a busy night tonight. See all these shells? I gotta put them in my shotgun.
Apple Valley, Walmart
Overheard by Tara. -
Can I Dip Them In Sugar?
Mom: No candy. I’m serious.
Little girl: What about ice cream?
Mom: No SUGAR.
Little girl: Then what CAN I get?
Mom: CHIPS!Minneapolis, CVS Pharmacy Franklin & Nicollet
Overheard by Yeah, that’s healthy. -
That Should Make All The Parents Feel Good
Freshman girl inspecting dresses, to friend: Are you kidding? I can’t wear this to homecoming! No one would grind with me!!
Minneapolis, uptown Urban outfitters
Overheard by Because after all, that’s what it’s all about. -
Is This Cub Foods Or Drink?
Man carrying 24 pack of Milwaukee’s Best: You smell really good.
Woman (headed to her car): Hah, okay. Thanks. (gets in her car and starts it up. Music starts playing from car speakers at reasonable level)
Old man on sidewalk: Yeah, yeah! Turn it up!
Woman (now in car): Hah, yup. Okay.Plymouth, Cub Foods
Overheard by ldg. -
But That Was, Like, A Lot Of Months Ago
College-age girl with pink hair: Ugh. I haven’t sold a single knife, like, ALL MONTH. I suck at this. I should just give up on life now.
College-age guy: Whoa, now, don’t go all Williy Loman on me.
College-age girl: Who?
College-age guy: Willy Loman. Main character from Death of a Salesman? We read it in Lit last semester.
College-age girl: Oh. Right. He was all depressed, but didn’t everything work out okay for him?
(pause)
College-age guy: Jenny, the play is called “Death of…” Remind me again how you passed that class?Minnetonka, Ridgedale Mall, Food Court
Overheard by Sparknotes?
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