Posts Tagged ‘st paul’
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Poetry
Old man: Like Prince say, “When dogs cry…”
Young man: That ain’t right.
Old man: That’s what I’m sayin! When a dog cry, somethin ain’t right!
Young man: No. The Prince song. It’s “When Doves Cry.”
Old man: Hell, man, that was a long time ago. I don’t ‘member ‘xactly. Still, when a dog cry, you know somethin’ wrong. When a dog cry, you know somethin’ ain’t right.St. Paul, Bus Route 21, Easbound on Marshall
Overheard by me. -
And Nobody Knows How To Pretend
Diner in next booth: It isn’t always the big fights on stage that hurts performers; there was one case where a woman got slapped every night for one run and she went deaf in her ear on that side. People don’t realize how important fight coordinators are for safety.
Saint Paul, Chatterbox in Highland
Overheard by Cat. -
That Nice Thing Really Holds Them Back
Employee: Nice guys never finish last, but they ARE never in the top 3 either!
St. Paul, Axman Surplus
Overheard by OhTheresAClause. -
All Ages Show Down
Beefy clubber: Yo dude, that’s my girl you’re dancing with!
Beefy clubber’s girlfriend: FUCK YOU!
Guy dancing with clubber’s girlfriend: BOOYAH!St. Paul, Valentinos 16+ Stoplight Party
Overheard by dancing bystander. -
All In One Convenient Location
Bundled up apparently non-frat boy to friend: I’ve never been to a frat party, but the story is it’s total bros and total hoes.
St. Paul, Hamline Target
Overheard by What else would you expect? -
How Big Are The Carcasses?
30-something guy on cell: I would rather just sit around than cut off flesh from carcasses.
St. Paul, Blockbuster
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It’s Burns Calories If You Spin Fast Enough
20-something girl walking out the door to her friend: When someone first told me they took a spinning class I thought they meant spinning in circles.
St. Paul, YMCA
Overheard by Its the only logical thought… -
But Now You Know What I’m Thinking About
Loud guy, to girl in lobby: Hey, you’re sort of a little hottie! Too bad we’re related.
Saint Paul, Cafe Latte
Overheard by QuoteRadar. -
As Long As It’s Not Animal Print…
U of M employee during white elephant gift exchange: OH MY GOD! Peggy* got a Snuggie!!
St. Paul, U of M administrative holiday party
Overheard by guest. -
Even That Doesn’t Take Very Long These Days
Office worker: Well, maybe your dad’s going into the bathroom and your mom thinks that he’s peeing but he’s really just reading the newspaper.
Saint Paul, office
Overheard by I just process the numbers. -
Nobody Likes A Braggart
Man walking by classroom on phone: I’ve done it all over, even out of state.
St. Paul, Concordia St. Paul Classroom
Overheard by I’m intriguied by your experience. -
How Will She Pay For Her Books?
College girl on phone: Well, did you make him pay you? (pause) Then you’re not a hooker, you’re just a slut.
St. Paul, University of Minnesota Campus
Overheard by Neither One. -
And Is There Any Way You Can Be Taller?
Girlfriend: These look really good. They have ricotta cheese in them!
Boyfriend: Ick, the cheese will make me sick.
Girlfriend: Your lactose intolerance is really getting on my nerves.St. Paul, Midway Target
Overheard by Deli Man. -
We All Need To Be Proud Of Something
40 year old woman, to her family (including kids) as she enters: The only thing he’s good at is impregnating women.
St. Paul, a hole in the wall Italian restaurant
Overheard by More vino please. -
Feel All That Cheer In The Air
Disgruntled dad, to kid running around: Get over here, stay with the rest of the group! You’ll be kidnapped! Hopefully.
Saint Paul, Rice Park
Overheard by Burrhead. -
This Is All You Ever Need To Know
13 year old boy: The secret is to find someone who has something wrong with them that you can deal with!
Saint Paul, La Cabana
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If It’s Not Adam Lambert Then I Don’t Care!
Teen Girl #1, referring to Cab Calloway song playing from overhead speakers: Ugh! What IS this music?
Teen Girl# 2: Uh, Opera.St. Paul, restroom in Mancini’s Char House and Lounge
Overheard by Coco. -
They’re All Thinking It
Guy trying to pick up an annoyed-looking woman: Can’t anyone say “hi” anymore? Can’t I get a ”s’up”? A “fuck you”? A “bitch”?
St. Paul, 50 bus
Overheard by friendly greetings. -
His Liver Is More Impressive Than His Checkbook
Drunk Guy in Detox: I’m from Edina. I can pay drinking tickets like this, this and that. You should be impressed how many I’ve already paid.
St. Paul, University of St. Thomas Public Safety
Overheard by Poor in Comparison. -
Can’t The Spaces Just Work It Out?
Target employee over walkie talkie: Do we have any space dividers for… dividing spaces?
St. Paul, Target store on Snelling Ave.
Overheard by Captain Obvious.
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