Annoying, loud, complaining pregnant co-worker in other office at 11:30 am: Oh my god! I have two different shoes on.

St. Paul, State office building
Overheard by Government Workers.

Post-lunch guy to friend: Is he still in that long distance marriage thing?

Saint Paul, Bethel University
Overheard by aeh.

Middle-aged woman (to girls in their early 20s): You all look so great, I love your dresses. What did you girls do today?
Girl: Thank you, we all went to brunch this morning.
Middle-aged woman: Well, you look so sharp. (pauses, waits until girls walk away, turns to friend) Ugh, I wish I didn’t have kids so I could go to brunch!

St. Paul, Downtown, Art Crawl
Overheard by A.

Woman #1: Sarah Palin is the most anti-woman woman I’ve ever seen.
Woman #2: Yeah, I know. She just needs to turn in her uterus.

Saint Paul, Coffeeshop

Girl #1, sitting on couch to her friend: I hate it when people sit on chairs that are facing me. It’s irritating.
Girl #2: Yeah, I hate it too. There are other places they can sit.

St Paul, Bethel University
Overheard by girl sitting on chair facing you.

A teenager talking about Sarah Palin: She’s really hot for, like, an old lady.

Saint Paul, CVS on Grand
Overheard by Nate.

College Guy #1: My penis is getting stronger!
College Guy #2: What does that even mean?  How do you know?
College Guy #1: Cuz I can pee past the bushes now and for a while I couldn’t!
College Guy #2: Niiiice! (the two guys high five)

St Paul, Das Hus
Overheard by a.lil.

Bearded college guy: I almost saw a high school girl’s vagina today!

St. Paul, Das Hus
Overheard by a.lil.

Woman #1: Be careful…
Woman #2, whispering: Because it’s the Cities.

St. Paul, River Centre
Overheard by yes, be careful.

Fashionable, ditzy young woman at cheese counter: A lot of girls cheat on their taxes because they just don’t know how to do them.

St. Paul, Whole Foods
Overheard by Dismayed feminist.

Guy #1: Dude, it’s like Hinduism or something.
Guy #2: No, that’s from Terminator.

St. Paul, Das Hus
Overheard by rjc.

Woman getting off at Albert: You sure you can’t drop me off one block up?
Bus driver: I can’t be that sweet. I’ll give you a cavity.

St. Paul, Westbound 50
Overheard by The Nav.

Drunk #1, enjoying a 12 pack of Natural Ice at 10 a.m: How many beers you drink of mine?
Drunk #2 (angry): See this beer right here?  That’s my only one cause I been sober for two weeks.

Saint Paul, 280 and University
Overheard by berrywise.

20-something selfish bitch to receptionist at the OB/GYN office: Can you call the nurse and ask her to bring different magazines in here? These are all parenting magazines and I’m not even pregnant.

Saint Paul, United Children’s Hospital
Overheard by I just want to slap her on the face.

Misbehaving child pointing at elderly man leaving, crutch and cane in hand: Mum, look. Look he can’t walk! Look he can’t walk!
Young Mother: (silence)

St Paul, DQ
Overheard by teach your kid some respect.

Old woman (after three-hour Rosh Hashanah services): At least when I go to the Guthrie, I get an intermission.

Saint Paul, Mount Zion Temple
Overheard by sxoidmal.

Elderly Lady #1: Do you still have the sweaty bed?
Elderly Lady #2: Yes!

St. Paul, outside Finnish Bistro
Overheard by neophyte cataloger.

Young man on cell phone: I think I left mah teef in yo car.

St. Paul, Rice Street White Castle
Overheard by Slider Pilot.

College girl #1: Well, smoking is a natural laxative.
College girl #2: So, that’s why we lose weight when we do it.
College girl #1: Yeah, ’cause we smoke when we’re stressed instead of eat!
College girl #2: Yeah!  And I mean we’re all gonna die from something anyway sooo…
College girl #1: So, get rid of the cholesterol and obesity and bring on the lung cancer!
College girl #2 (yelling excitedly): Hell yeah!  Bring on the lung cancer! (the girls high five)

St Paul, Bethel University
Overheard by yeah…bring on the lung cancer…

Random boy on the Quad: FUCK, Heroes was on tonight!!

St. Paul, Hamline University
Overheard by it’s that important, huh?