Random girl at library table: I like being here in winter, when no one is around. Reminds me of Hogwarts.

Gustavus Adolphus College Library

Soon-to-be college female graduate (Mid-argument): No, no… whore has a silent ‘w’, you know, just like ‘what’ or, ‘wait’.
Male student: Are you joking? (extreme laughter ensues)

Gustavus Adolphus College Library
Overheard by Way to sound it out.

Guy #1: You can’t molest the elderly.
Guy #2: But they can molest you.
Girl: I know, and I love it when they do.

Gustavus Adolphus College, St. Peter, Olin Hall
Overheard by if your employer heard you say that…

Awkward professor #1: So, what are you up to this weekend?
Awkward professor #2: Ohh, it’s usually whatever the kids have going on.
Awkward professor #1: Oh, that’s what I figured.
Awkward professor #2: Yeah, we were at a softball tournament all weekend last week.
Awkward professor #1: Oh, yeah?
Awkward professor #2: Yeah, it sucked.

Midnight Express, Gustavus Adolphus College
Overheard by i’m glad he’s not MY dad.

Cool guy to roommate: That’s not even the most awkward thing you’ve walked in on me doing.

Gustavus Cafeteria, St. Peter , MN
Overheard by i don’t even want to know.

Freshman Boy #1: 15?  Did she have a license?
Freshman Boy #2: No, her mom dropped her off.

Cafeteria, Gustavus Adolphus College
Overheard by I won’t tell if you won’t tell.

Blondie: I looked for inner beauty in my belly button, but all I found was lint.

The Poolhouse, St Peter
Overheard by BAFO.

Girl to male friend:  So, do you like her or what?
Male friend:  I guess I haven’t really decided a yes or no yet. She has good teeth, though.

Coffee Shop, Gustavus
Overheard by Talk about standards.

Ditzy blonde girl #1: Damn corporate America.
Ditzy blonde girl #2: Yeah, where is corporate America?

Student center, Gustavus Adolphus college
Overheard by . . really?

Hooded sweatshirt boy to friends: Oh guys, I totally thought up an awesome tongue twister while I was homeless!

Student center, Gustavus Adolphus college
Overheard by ORLY?!

Event-planning girl #1, discussing kids’ carnival: We could make them play a game where they have to hop like bunnies, for prizes.
Event-planning girl #2, in charge of mascot and prizes: Yeah, and then he could pull it out.
Random boy far across lobby: THAT’S WHAT SHE SAID!

Library, Gustavus
Overheard by he beat me to the punchline!

Loud girl joking about starting over on a paper:  What’s with us and STRIPPING?
Friend who also is starting over: God, I know right?  This is gross.

Gustavus Courtyard Cafe
Overheard by go write/strip/whatever in the library already.

Clarinet girl:  I have, like, this fetish with office supplies, especially the electric stapler.
Her friend:  O-m-g, what?
Clarinet girl:  Yeah, sometimes my roommate and I dance with it.  And the boys above us creep at our window.
Her friend:  Oh… interesting.

Music Building Hallway, Gustavus
Overheard by: glad i don’t live near them..and glad i wasn’t stuck with either of them as a roommate.

Emo girl: So what’s so great about cigarettes without tobacco?
Mullet:  I find them interesting.  I’m a connoisseur of smokables.
Emo girl: So you smell bad, then.
Mullet: Uhh… [looks around awkwardly]

Library, Gustavus
Overheard by i can smell him from here.

Senior Class Gift Committee Member #1:  Do you want to donate? We’re making the chapel handicap accessible.
Senior Class Gift Committee Member #2: Yeah, a?nd the class of 1958 will match whatever we make.
Senior Nursing major:  1958?  So they’re old right?
Senior Class Gift Committee Member #1: Well, yes… in their 70s.
Nursing major:  So they like, need the handicap stuff?

Gustavus Adolphus College Grad Finale
Overheard by hopefully she won’t be taking care of me someday.

Smoker outside bar:  Yeah, pretty soon babies will start coming out with limbs attached already.
Smoker #2:  I blame the parents.

Patrick’s on Third, St. Peter (Gustavus Adolphus College)
Overheard by were your limbs not attached at birth???