15 year old scene queen after trying on a t-shirt and walking out of the fitting room: I can’t believe I couldn’t fit into the youth large and have to buy an adult small.
Friend:  That’s because you ate.

Hot Topic, MOA
Overheard by You look fat when you cry.

14 year old: Dude, have you seen the new Batman movie?
Friend: Yeah, on Friday.
14 year old: You loser! (pauses) Was it awesome?
Friend: Yes.

Lakeville Theatre

Crowd of teenage girls galloping forward with sticks and fists in the air: FOR NARNIA!!!!

Hopkins High School
Overheard by who knew early morning cross country practice could be this much fun?

Teen talking to friend at urinal: How many people do you think have wacked off into this urinal?

Arbor Lakes AMC
Overheard by Seriously?!

Teenage Girl #1: That would SO never happen. The ugly guy never gets the girl.
Teenage Girl #2: I KNOW. She would so be looking for a hotter guy.
Concerned Mom behind them: They’re robots. It’s a movie, and you missed the point. She loves his personality.
Teenage Girl #1: Fuck personality. I want money and a hot guy.
Guy Staring at Young Teenager: That can be arranged.

AMC Arbor Lakes 16
Overheard by Ironic…who thought that Wall E had a good message.

Teenage girl #1: Anthropologie has such cute clothes.
Teenage girl #2: (enthusiastically) I know. Sometimes I just want to lick the tags!

Arbor Lakes Anthropologie

Young adolescent boy #1: Hey, remember the days when we didn’t wanna get with girls and thought they had cooties?
Young adolescent boy #2: Yeah. I mean, I never thought that myself but a lot of people our age did.
Much younger boy, probably about 9: Yeah, I totally remember those days.

Hiawatha Park, Minneapolis
Overheard by those were the days.

Teenager to dad: Are the pilots professionals?

Boarding a NWA flight from Mpls to Vegas
Overheard by Samantha.

Teen, emphatically desperate to convince her friends: He wasn’t lying!! It was on Facebook!!

Excelsior 4th of July fireworks
Overheard by The Usher.

20-something girl, to teenage sister who put car key in her mouth: What’s with you eating the key?
Teenage girl: It tastes good, like iron.  I like licking blood because it tastes the same way.

post-fireworks, downtown Stillwater
Overheard by: Stroller Dad

Jittery teen after 20 minutes of fireworks: Alright, that’s it. My ADHD is setting in.
Friend: Uhh… you can’t have ADHD during fireworks!!

Delano fireworks
Overheard by I know a doctor who would disagree.

Too-loud teenager: Someday, I would just like to be kidnapped.

Perkins in Plymouth
Overheard by dream big.

Pothead teen: Man, I’m gonna get so baked at the concert this weekend!
Naive good girl: You really shouldn’t sit in the sun like that, you could get skin cancer.

Wayzata High School
Overheard by and i thought i was sheltered.

Teen girl on bus (to her friend): Yeah, but remember, you hate sex.
Her friend: (contemplating a moment) Yeahhh, you’re right, I do!  I really do.
Teen girl on bus: Well, you know, someday when you actually have esPERience –
Her friend: Yeah, I guess. But so far –
Teen girl on bus: All it be is skanky to you, right?
Her friend: You know it!

#17 bus
Overheard by It CAN be skanky…

Senior Boy: I HAVE NO CAPACITY FOR PORN!

Wayzata High School Senior Party
Overheard by I doubt that…

Teen boy: You know, I really appreciate you complimenting my baseball skills, but I really don’t appreciate you complimenting my boxer choices.

South High Locker Room
Overheard by just trying to get to class…

Teenage girl: You are walking me all the way down to the gym or else I am not hanging out with you all weekend!!
Teenage boyfriend: You are being so sassy!
Teenage girl: ALL WEEKEND!

Wayzata High School
Overheard by hallwaywanderer.

Teenage Girl (Matter-of-Factly): My sister’s friend came over yesterday because it was Memorial Day, you know, because she’s a stripper.

Wayzata High School
Overheard by Yeah, that makes total sense…

Teen Girl: We don’t get to keep the gowns. We get to keep the hats.
Mom: Umm, yeah, I know.
Teen Girl: Those hats are so stupid.  I’d rather gag than wear it.

Kohl’s in Blaine
Overheard by the Elderly Multigravida.

Teenage girl: I want a husband who will call me ‘bitch’ as a joke.
Friend: …

The Tea Garden, Minneapolis
Overheard by Nunya Bidnat.