Posts Tagged ‘u of mn’
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That’s Because Her Roommate Threw Up In It Last Week
College girl: My baritone smells like an alcoholic.
Willey Hall, UofM west bank campus
Overheard by Probably Grandpa’s doing. -
Then How Can You Know?!
Girl (to pizza Delivery Guy): How do they check for deliciousness? They said they check for deliciousness!
Delivery Guy: I didn’t touch it, don’t worry.St. Paul, Bailey Hall U of M Campus
Overheard by Working Late. -
Every Man’s Rite Of Passage
College guy to his friends in the cafeteria: Dude, he woke up in a onesie; in a Snuggie. With a sword.
University of Minnesota
Overheard by Just another day at the U. -
Cover Your Face
Young man, to his group of friends: If I saw her, I swear I’d kick her in the face and punch her in the vagina. (To the young lady now staring at him) But not you! I wouldn’t punch you in the vagina because you’re lovely!
U of M- the mall
Overheard by Right in the babymaker! -
That’s The Best You Can Come Up With?
Fellow office worker: You know, if you really want to do something gross, go back in the labs and smell the rats.
U of M research labs
Overheard by I’ll just stick to waking up to smell the coffee. -
Not This Time
College girl #1: I really don’t feel like going to class today. Let’s play hooker.
College girl #2: Umm, you mean “hooky,” right? You want to play hooky.University of Minnesota
Overheard by You don’t need a college degree for that. -
Worst Breakup Speech Ever?
New coworker on the phone to her boyfriend: Sexy is as sexy does, and I just don’t feel it. You don’t make my juices flow.
Minneapolis, office at the University of Minnesota
Overheard by Good to know. -
I Don’t Spend Enough Time At The U
14 yo wrestling camp participant #1: These girls are really flirting at this campus.
14 yo wrestling camp participant #2: Yeah, I’ve been flashed twice.Minneapolis, UMN campus
Overheard by hellonewman. -
He’s Just Disappointed With His Current Allowance
7-year-old: I want a disability! I want a disability!
University of Minnesota bus
Overheard by NikkiW. -
Hope It’s Soft Cardboard
Presiding Faculty: You may now move your tassels from the right side of your mortarboard to the left.
Highlights and Fake Bake Girl: Mortarboard! I thought these were just cardboard!St. Paul, University of St. Thomas Commencement
Overheard by paid too much for education. -
Is This A Pretend Ceremony Before The Real One?
University of Minnesota CLA Graduate: Oh my gosh, these hats look just like the ones that owls wear!
Minneapolis, Graduation at Northrop
Overheard by Another graduate. -
Someone Forgot To Tell Her The Real World Comes Without Spell Check
Soon-to-be-college grad in line for commencement and filling out form with name and major: How do you spell psychology?
U of M campus, University of Minnesota graduation
Overheard by Fellow grad feeling less proud of her accomplishment. -
It’s Possible She Doesn’t Remember How Good It Was
College girl #1: So, I was trying to think of what I did last night to make the side of my head so sore, and then I remembered.
College girl #2: What did you do?
College girl #1: I had drunken sex with my head smashed up against the wall.
College girl #2: Oh. Was it good?
College girl #1: It would have been perfectly fine if it were normal sex. I’m all for waking up with bruises if the sex is mindblowing, you know. And it was just ok. So, I’m disappointed.U of M, Northrop Mall
Overheard by Rough Rider? -
I Have This On A Motivational Poster
Guy outside the window: Whoever’s taking a final right now, fuck you!
U of M Folwell Hall
Overheard by the sucker taking a final. -
The Tattoo Should Say That
College-age girl to college-age boy: I just can’t do it. I just can’t get a tattoo in German. People will think I’m a Nazi. And I’m not a Nazi. Not at all.
U of M campus
Overheard by A person with a German last name, which apparently means I’m a Nazi. -
And I Cry When Someone Calls Me A Maggot
Short girl: I could never live the military lifestyle. I eat far too slow.
U of M, West Bank Skyway
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Why He’s No Longer Welcome At His Parent’s House
Guy on phone: And then I said, “No, no, if I’d been drunk you’d have seemed pretty and intelligent.”
U of MN Campus
Overheard by omgjack. -
You’ll Find Him There In 15 Years
Douche-y college guy to his five douche-y college friends: A typical summer day for me is like, wake up, have a cigarette, go out to the car, pour a drink, hang around for awhile, go to my friends and smoke 4 to 3 bowls. I say 4 to 3 because it’s usually more rather than less. Then I go to work for a few hours, and afterwards I have sex with my girlfriend. That’s kinda what it’s like when you work in fast food.
One of his douche-y friends: Hey, it’s not fast food. It’s good food fast!U of M – Dinkytown
Overheard by He has a girlfriend!?!? -
How To Derail A Lecture
Girl walking by open door to lecture hall, inadvertently talking too loud: You bring the KY and I’ll come over!
U of M St. Paul Campus
Overheard by I’d come over too. -
It’s Totally In A Gay Way
College Guy #1: I think about you.
College Guy #2: What?
College Guy #1: Not in a gay way, but, sorta in a gay way.University of Minnesota, Church Street
Overheard by I try not to think.
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